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Our story of rape and reconciliation

6,371,557 views | Thordis Elva and Tom Stranger • TEDWomen 2016

In 1996, Thordis Elva shared a teenage romance with Tom Stranger, an exchange student from Australia. After a school dance, Tom raped Thordis, after which they parted ways for many years. In this extraordinary talk, Elva and Stranger move through a years-long chronology of shame and silence, and invite us to discuss the omnipresent global issue of sexual violence in a new, honest way. For a Q&A with the speakers, visit go.ted.com/thordisandtom.

In 1996, Thordis Elva shared a teenage romance with Tom Stranger, an exchange student from Australia. After a school dance, Tom raped Thordis, after which they parted ways for many years. In this extraordinary talk, Elva and Stranger move through a years-long chronology of shame and silence, and invite us to discuss the omnipresent global issue of sexual violence in a new, honest way. For a Q&A with the speakers, visit go.ted.com/thordisandtom.

This talk was presented at an official TED conference. TED's editors chose to feature it for you.

About the speakers

Thordis Elva

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Thordis Elva is one of the two authors of "South of Forgiveness," a unique collaboration between a survivor and perpetrator of rape.

Tom Stranger

Co-author, landscape gardener

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Tom Stranger is the co-author of "South of Forgiveness."

Learn more

This talk was presented at an official TED conference. TED's editors chose to feature it for you.