Ideas worth spreading

Can we choose to fall out of love?

4,411,776 views | Dessa • TEDxWanChai

What's the best way to get over heartbreak? Rapper and writer Dessa came up with an unconventional approach after a chance viewing of Helen Fisher's TED Talk about the brains of the lovestruck. In a wryly funny talk, she describes how she worked with a neuroscientist to try to get her brain to fall out of love with her ex -- and shares wisdom about romance that she gained along the way.

What's the best way to get over heartbreak? Rapper and writer Dessa came up with an unconventional approach after a chance viewing of Helen Fisher's TED Talk about the brains of the lovestruck. In a wryly funny talk, she describes how she worked with a neuroscientist to try to get her brain to fall out of love with her ex -- and shares wisdom about romance that she gained along the way.

This talk was presented to a local audience at TEDxWanChai, an independent event. TED's editors chose to feature it for you.

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About the speaker

Dessa

Rapper, singer and writer

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Dessa is an internationally touring rapper, singer and writer who built a career by defying genre conventions and audience expectations.

Cold Spring Harbor Laboratory | DNA Learning Center, AXS Studio, Vivid Apps 2009 | Explore

3D Brain

A free app — great study guide to help visualize and understand brain structures.

Helen Fisher | TED, 2008 | Watch

"The brain in love"

Dr. Fisher recounts her research into the neuroanatomical regions associated with romantic love. Accessible, entertaining and surprising.

Helen Fisher | Ballantine Books, 1994 | Book

Anatomy of Love: A Natural History of Mating, Marriage, and Why We Stray

A fascinating read — full of interesting models of human partnership and the theories behind why we behave the way we do.

M.B. Sterman, R.W. LoPresti and M.D. Fairchild | Journal of Neuropathy, 2010 | Article

"Electroencephalographic and Behavioral Studies of Monomethyl Hydrazine Toxicity in the Cat"

A serious study — definitely not light reading — but this account of neurofeedback captivated me.

Dessa | Dutton, 2018 | Book

My Own Devices: True Stories from the Road on Music, Science, and Senseless Love

I wrote this one. The last essay in the book tells the story in fuller detail, describing the collaborations with both Dr. Olman and clinician Penijean Gracefire and the history of my romance with my ex.

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This talk was presented to a local audience at TEDxWanChai, an independent event. TED's editors chose to feature it for you.

Read more about TEDx.