Betsy Shea-Taylor

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Betsy Shea-Taylor
Posted about 1 year ago
What does it mean to be human?
My immediate thought is that many attributes, qualities, frailties and actions define what it means to be human. However, I think those who are trying to understand and surmount differences between and among individuals, countries, cultures, ages for the purpose of harmony and understanding and peace, are most ably demonstrating what it means to be human. I think the desire for meaningful connection, in which each of us is witnessed and valued for who we are or are trying to become and are recovering from, lives in each of us, even those who clamor that it just isn't so.
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Betsy Shea-Taylor
Posted about 1 year ago
Can you love someone you do not or no longer respect?
I should have written "undermined" -- was probably thinking "underhanded!" If someone lies to me about a matter of significance (in my view), I may have some remaining trust that would be a seed for rebuilding, but my full-blown trust would have been undermined or challenged by that behavior.
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Betsy Shea-Taylor
Posted about 1 year ago
Can you love someone you do not or no longer respect?
Edward, thank you for your response. I posted this, curious about how others might answer, using their own definitions. Loosely, I'd say that "love" (for me) could be conditional or unconditional, depending upon the object. We see love perish every day for any number of reasons. Look at the divorce rate. Respect has dual, unrelated meanings for me 1)-- something accorded unconditionally to someone's innate humanity and 2. conditional, predicated on the way someone chooses to live. But anyone who answers will have their own definitions. What are yours?
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Betsy Shea-Taylor
Posted about 1 year ago
What inner change have you made to shift the entire trajectory of your life?
Greg, thank you for your response to the question. I'd characterize myself the way you characterized yourself. However, I had certain beliefs about the world and my place in it that had no structure on which to hang. One day I was in a bookstore and found writings by Thich Nhat Hahn, a Buddhist monk. I thought: "Well this is what I've been seeking -- a community of like-minded." My desires: I felt I needed more patience, though I had quite a bit, I felt I needed more ease with the concept of "don't know" rather than always trying to find answers, and I wanted help in focusing more on the present moment than on past or future. I was granted that structure and support when I picked up that first book. Meditation has helped me make things stick.
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Betsy Shea-Taylor
Posted about 1 year ago
How do(did) you raise your kids?
Good morning edulover We encouraged our child practically from the moment she was born to take her hunger for life directly to the source, whatever or whomever that source might be. Be yourself, allow your child to be herself, a balancing act for sure! Our examples: Once our daughter started dining at the table on adult foods we served her by holding bowls of food and allowing her to take her own helping, instead of forcing some bogus parental standard of how much she should eat. She never had food issues. We informed her that when she felt she could stay dry during the night she could wear grown-up girl panties (which she knew were awaiting her in a drawer) instead of diapers. It worked beautifully. She decided when, without a fuss. As she matured we always nudged her to speak up, stand up, try, fail, try again -- doing as many things on her own behalf as she could and would. She knew we always had her back, she knew her parents each loved her fiercely and unconditionally and supported her; we just did not do her all living and growing for her. That was her right. We interceded only when she was unable to handle an issue. Some might see this as indulgence. Quite the opposite. We knew that within that lively being was someone whose quality of life would depend forever on being able to make wise decisions for herself. Today she is still lively, married, professionally adept, engaged in the world, loving, connected with family and completely at ease with making all the tough decisions. So, our message as parents together (later, as single parent) always was "We believe in you. You can do it." It was worlds removed from the hovering, fretting and micro-managing that appears to flavor so much of today's parenting. It meant letting go all along the way, in age-appropriate ways, so our daughter could grab hold -- of her own life, that is. It was not always easy, that I can assure you! But worthwhile matters seldom are. Enjoy every moment with your child!