Jun 16 2012: Wow! That is a lot of questions. I will try to answer your main question, I believe happiness is attainable however the western worlds idea of what makes us happy in today's world appears completely skewed. I think the goal of happiness differs from individual to individual and the reason most do not find it is what people think will make them happy is unattainable or isn't what will make them happy.
In my opinion happiness is something that has come through time, moments of depression and negative experiences has made me more grateful for where I am now. I feel I have all I need to be happy and for the most part I am. ( obviously I cannot say I am 100% happy I feel it is very difficult to obtaine, even more so when in such a society where you are constantly subjected to messages that tell you you are not happy and wont be until you purchase the newest phone, etc ) I think human happiness naturally stems from love, family companions lovers animals and that western focus has shifted from this to material need.
It is an important emotion to hold, however to acquire constant happiness is something I couldn't perceive but I wouldn't discount it.
A small amount of individuals will always create extreme amounts of money however The way they earn it and what they do with it is what would create my admiration. I think governments should tax the rich a lot more than they do however I also feel that people with money should do a lot more with it for the general good of the nation or for people in need. But that is my idealistic dreamy View.
I'm aware that the government let the rich get away with too much and the individuals are too happy just to let the money sit in an account or investment for no more reason than it belongs to them. Its quite difficult to point the finger at one or the other...
Jun 15 2012: I think it's a shame most people don't look after their elders any more. Where I am from people seem to think it is okay just to leave them to their own devises or put them away into a care home. I believe that it is partially because that people have become more self absorbed. Instead of thinking about how they can help they think about the impact that it would have on their lives.
1. Tip to the children - think about the person you need to look after, about other cultures where children ensure their folks have a comfortable life before themselves.
2. Tip to the parents - Don't be afraid to ask for help if you need it.
3. Handling tough situations - no matter who you are asking for help is something you should not be afraid of. It does not make you weak.
4. Drawing the line - Make sure both party's are in agreement on how things will run, kindly but firmly keep those in place.
Jun 10 2012: The thing that pains me the most is the loss of the written word. Letters used to be a main method of communication. now things are so fast , emails facebook and twitter people don't stop about what to write. The second would be the developing lack of ability to defer gratification. The must have now attitude that is developing is repressive and harmful in my opinion. The third issue I see ties into the second and that is the ''throw away culture'' that is developing in all of society but can prodmanantly be seen in fashion. Not only are there different fashions every week and the cloths are built to last short periods of time people are losing the skills to fix things, mend socks, tailor cloths... etc This is one example of this... electronics built with faults is another.
Jun 7 2012: One thing that honestly helps me is acts of kindness. Helping others makes you feel needed I guess.
When I feel terribly bad as if I cannot leave the house I tidy a bit, or make dinner for my partner, If feeling a little better I will walk to the shops and pick up some litter along the way, or move a box, help someone on a bus, give to someone who needs it etc. It is important for me to take care in these things and to think about the impact no matter how small.
If I feel capable I volunteer. This is something I do anyway however I feel working for others is humbling.
One thing i do often, that always makes me feel better is to shop for someone in need, where I live there are allot of homeless and I was once part of the ''problem'' no fault of my own. I always remember the random acts of kindness I received and truly believe that that is the one thing that kept me sane! something someone used to do for me is every Wednesday they would buy me lunch. I now do the same, knowing what a difference it makes, that human connection no matter how fleeting makes me feel better even if just slightly.
Another thing I do is to stop. Go somewhere where I can truly absorb how small and insignificant my life is within the bigger picture. I know it sounds weird, often the feeling of being insignificant is a catalyst for, not a preventative action however feeling the wind across my face or seeing the expanse above me helps me understand that nothing is forever. My depression will pass and life is so frail one must take the opportunity to live it to the fullest.
But everyone is different.
Depression however is hard to shake. My only advice is not to take medication for it. It is not known fully the impacts of anti depressants on an individual. Try natural ways to boost serotonin levels, conversation can help, and so do setting personal goals. If you are thinking of getting profetional help, look at the different therapys avalible and choose one that is right for you.
Jun 7 2012: You posted another question, about 5 things that one learns that is the most important. One I forgot to mention is to fall in love every day. Life is such a beautiful thing. However to answer your question directly. I think someone can love many but from my limited experience of one person I believe that there is one person in MY lifetime I feel I could ever be interwoven completely. I think that this sort of bond can go beyond love. However, putting my psychologists hat on I think that it could largely be affected by personality, genetics, up bringing and life experiences...and of course chance.
Love comes in many shapes and forms and each time you realise you love, be it a moment, an animal, water dripping off your window pane or while looking up at the universe it is so unique and awe inspiring ... I guess that's what makes it special.
Jun 7 2012: 1. To consciously learn from everyone I meet.
2. To commit random acts of kindness as much as possible.
3. I am not alone.
4. Terrible things happen, but most of the time they make you a stronger, wiser person.
5. To read.
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A comment on Conversation: What is happiness? Is it an important human value or just overrated? Many readily sacrifice it for sufficiency and contentment. Is this ok?
In my opinion happiness is something that has come through time, moments of depression and negative experiences has made me more grateful for where I am now. I feel I have all I need to be happy and for the most part I am. ( obviously I cannot say I am 100% happy I feel it is very difficult to obtaine, even more so when in such a society where you are constantly subjected to messages that tell you you are not happy and wont be until you purchase the newest phone, etc ) I think human happiness naturally stems from love, family companions lovers animals and that western focus has shifted from this to material need.
It is an important emotion to hold, however to acquire constant happiness is something I couldn't perceive but I wouldn't discount it.
A comment on Conversation: Should Abortion be legal world wide despite religious beliefs?
A comment on Conversation: Do you admire the richest of your society or blame the system for allowing them to exploit the system ?
A small amount of individuals will always create extreme amounts of money however The way they earn it and what they do with it is what would create my admiration. I think governments should tax the rich a lot more than they do however I also feel that people with money should do a lot more with it for the general good of the nation or for people in need. But that is my idealistic dreamy View.
I'm aware that the government let the rich get away with too much and the individuals are too happy just to let the money sit in an account or investment for no more reason than it belongs to them. Its quite difficult to point the finger at one or the other...
A comment on Conversation: What was a great piece of advice you received and who provided it to you?
A comment on Conversation: Our parents took care of us when we were kids. Why the grown-up kids don't take care of the parents?[not everyone;especially after marriage]
1. Tip to the children - think about the person you need to look after, about other cultures where children ensure their folks have a comfortable life before themselves.
2. Tip to the parents - Don't be afraid to ask for help if you need it.
3. Handling tough situations - no matter who you are asking for help is something you should not be afraid of. It does not make you weak.
4. Drawing the line - Make sure both party's are in agreement on how things will run, kindly but firmly keep those in place.
A comment on Conversation: Urban society has it's gifts. Being around people all the time - What have we lost?
A comment on Conversation: How do you actually cope with depression?
When I feel terribly bad as if I cannot leave the house I tidy a bit, or make dinner for my partner, If feeling a little better I will walk to the shops and pick up some litter along the way, or move a box, help someone on a bus, give to someone who needs it etc. It is important for me to take care in these things and to think about the impact no matter how small.
If I feel capable I volunteer. This is something I do anyway however I feel working for others is humbling.
One thing i do often, that always makes me feel better is to shop for someone in need, where I live there are allot of homeless and I was once part of the ''problem'' no fault of my own. I always remember the random acts of kindness I received and truly believe that that is the one thing that kept me sane! something someone used to do for me is every Wednesday they would buy me lunch. I now do the same, knowing what a difference it makes, that human connection no matter how fleeting makes me feel better even if just slightly.
Another thing I do is to stop. Go somewhere where I can truly absorb how small and insignificant my life is within the bigger picture. I know it sounds weird, often the feeling of being insignificant is a catalyst for, not a preventative action however feeling the wind across my face or seeing the expanse above me helps me understand that nothing is forever. My depression will pass and life is so frail one must take the opportunity to live it to the fullest.
But everyone is different.
Depression however is hard to shake. My only advice is not to take medication for it. It is not known fully the impacts of anti depressants on an individual. Try natural ways to boost serotonin levels, conversation can help, and so do setting personal goals. If you are thinking of getting profetional help, look at the different therapys avalible and choose one that is right for you.
A comment on Conversation: What is your biggest regret so far?
A comment on Conversation: Can one only fall in love once?
Love comes in many shapes and forms and each time you realise you love, be it a moment, an animal, water dripping off your window pane or while looking up at the universe it is so unique and awe inspiring ... I guess that's what makes it special.
A comment on Conversation: What are 5 things you have learned that has completely changed your life?
2. To commit random acts of kindness as much as possible.
3. I am not alone.
4. Terrible things happen, but most of the time they make you a stronger, wiser person.
5. To read.