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Michael Ullinger

Student - B.S - Computer Science, Baldwin-Wallace College

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How do you deal with introvert vs. extrovert tensions?

When I was president of my fraternity in college, I noticed a lot of tension between myself and some of the extroverts in leadership positions. They often felt that I wasn't moving fast enough, or that I couldn't make decisions effectively. As an introvert, how do you convey to people that you need time and space to make effective decisions? As an extrovert, how do you work with people that you feel aren't deciding things quickly enough? Are there other things that make you feel tension between introverts and extroverts?


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  • Mar 7 2012: In the case of Introverts - decision making is taking long time because they check the pros and cons and would like to see the many alternatives and may not be able to decide on any one. The problem with extrovert is Instant decision making and it is a dangerous trend. You have to call the fire fighters when dealing with extroverts.
    My son used ask me " I need space - give me time to decide" - It is not space, in fact you need some one close to you to certify that your idea or decision is good. For extroverts - no support is needed because they don't bother about consequences. The best thing is -- look around, select a good friend - particularly whose wave lengths matches with yours.. whether male or female - no issues - discuss everything except this extro or intro issues. When I was in late 30s an young lady ( colleague) met me and we became friends, close friends. Whatever I speak - she used to encourage me, praise me, ask me doubts, give me such a kind of support - I learned computer without going to any institute and trained all the office staff. So you need some one, some one on whom you can have good confidence.

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