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sarah boardman-miller

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What did you do/tell yourself when faced with something you thought was insurmountable?

I would love to hear about how you got from point A to point B when you saw no path. What did you tell yourself to keep forging ahead? What did you do to keep that path open?


Closing Statement from sarah boardman-miller

There is much we can learnfrom each other. Trusting that there is always a way. It may not be one you have thought of or one that you much like. All the same, it is path through. I wrote a piece tonight on just this. www.sparkignitefire.me it's called "chess"
Thank you so much for taking the time to read, answer and share.

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    Jan 8 2012: So great you bring up the stages of grief. Vicerally, one might go through those in a split second or a long process. That moment you are faced with your obstacle, making those choices based on the outcome of the stages. I wonder if one is in the situation surrounded by many, one feels more "comfortable" hanging out in the depression stage? If you are stranded on a desert island all by yourself would one "hang out" in that stage or move through it because there is no one else to show it to.

    Very curious.

    Love that you recognize the need to be inclusive of others whether they help you move through it or they might just "be" for you on any level.

    Thank you for your insight.
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      Jan 8 2012: Well, It is a matter of choice at the end of the day. People do enjoy hiding behind excuses and playing the victim. It seems to be our natural response to shift blame when the chips are down and slump into our comfort zone. If we look hard enough, we realise that the line between problem and opportunity is a matter of perspective. Habits also play a huge role in determining our response, but inorder to answer you desert island conundrum, I figure you mean to say that often People's response is audience-dependant. 'Learned Helplessness' feeds on some form of reinforcment,so, you are right to conclude that. However, these are extremely personal things.Too much pampering, or the other way around, need for attention , need to feel special and 100 different things influence human behaviour. Any attempt to generalise will still land us on on shaky grounds. Hence, I reiterate the need for trustworthy comrades who know us very well or some professionals , mentors to inspire us. Often, the best view to ourselves is through others.
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        Jan 8 2012: Dear Dean,
        Your comment is so well said, and I agree totally! It is a choice, and it is common to hide behind excuses, play the victim, shift blame, habits, learned helplessness,and slump into the comfort zone. I also percieve that the line between problem and opportunity is simply our perception. As one of my good friends often says..."it's not a problem, it's a feature"!

        To answer your question...
        First of all, I've never percieved anything as "insurmountable". I'm not always sure HOW I will move through the challenges in my life, and I always believed I was on this earth to learn, so I got right to the task at hand. If we do not see a path, it only means that we are blinded by our own fear, and that's ok, because fear is a natural response to a threat. However, to stay in a place of fear is not usually a good use of energy.I always believed that there WAS a path, and I needed to be open minded and open hearted enough to see it. I never knew where the path would take me, and that was ok...open hearted/minded. I took one step at a time, like after a near fatal head/brain injury when I was not expected to live, then not expected to ever function "normally" again. During and after the challenge with cancer, during and after life with a violent, abusive father, etc. etc. I was/am learning with each and every step, and in my 65 years on this earth school, I've noticed that there is ALWAYS a path. It sometimes doesn't look like what we "expect", so letting go of expectations is also am important part of the journey:>)

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