TED Conversations

Santiago Gonzalez

TEDCRED 500+
TEDx Organizer

This conversation is closed. Start a new conversation
or join one »

Being ready for making mistakes. Improving from failure.

Which is the best attitude to face mistakes? Should they be avoided at all cost?.How can we get rid of the fear of failure without falling in foolishness?

Topics: education happiness kids creativity learning mistakes
0
Share:
progress indicator
  • thumb

    brian herring

    • 0
    Nov 12 2011: nice to see people singing of the same sheet of music!
  • thumb

    Debra Smith 200+

    • 0
    Nov 12 2011: Harsh parenting and harsh authority figures often create a fear of failure and ridicule in kids which lasts into adulthood. Throughout my education I was able to ask the questions that everyone else was afraid to ask because they would look foolish because someone early on helped me to believe that 'the only dumb question is the one you do not ask'. I came to realize that if I did not know some other people might not know either and they were not comfortable asking.

    No one likes to fail but maybe we need to help each other reframe what failure is. Failure is when you lose the heart to try again and I am not so sure it is entirely the individual's failure in that case but rather it is the failure of the community especially when a child's spirit is broken this way.
  • thumb

    brian herring

    • +2
    Nov 12 2011: I try to see the humor in everything. Either my mistakes, or something I've said or done, I get out in front of it and make fun of myself or what happened before anyone else can use my mistakes against me in a harmful way. This point of view, also helps me communicate better with my co-workers, friends and family. Also, I realize at the end of the day there is nothing I have to get right that defines me as a person, so I have no external not internal pressure to succed or be right or not fail, and that is very freeing indeed.
    • thumb

      Colleen Steen 500+

      • +1
      Nov 12 2011: Brian,
      Humor with and for myself also helps move me through situations. "Falling in foolishness" as Santiago says, is not a bad idea, in my perception. I percieve life as an exploration, so I have no desire or need to get everything "right". I know I will do the best I can in any given moment, and that's all I can realistically do...I accept that. I don't even recognize "mistakes", but rather opportunities to learn and grow. If I realize something is not working, I change it...no mistake...simply an opportunity to learn more.

      Great statement Brian..."...at the end of the day there is nothing I have to get right that defines me as a person, so I have no external or internal pressure to succeed or be right or not fail, and that is very freeing indeed". I wholeheartedly agree with that my friend:>)
  • thumb

    heloise obyrne

    • 0
    Nov 11 2011: ooh i also think you shoud fail on purpose...go and say soemthing completely stupid...that way you are in control of the mistake you are not going to be disappointed that you didnt do well and you will see that itsnot so bad or hard to deal with:}
    • thumb

      Santiago Gonzalez 500+

      • 0
      TEDx Organizer
      Nov 12 2011: Well, missing on porpouse is not a real mistake, is it?. There is no possible success and no hope that can be ruined. In fact, doing so isgetting right instead of wrong, because the result you achieve is the one you are looking for!
  • thumb

    heloise obyrne

    • +1
    Nov 11 2011: mistakes are inevitable the only way to fully avoid them is not to try.....so its a choice. the best thing for me for fear is to not jump into the ocean but put on water wings and go into the shallow end ...eventually you can go further and further and your body learns that little splashes do not mean drowning... so if you have a certain fear of speaking or dancing or trying something new then it is good to set a safe place to practice these things..dancing first before a mirror then with strnagers you will never see then at your sisters wedding then at a one to one class then in a group and finally on stage. if you think while you sit in your liiving room about dancing on stage right now you will have a heart attack most people would! so you say i cant do that... but every one you see doing something amazing that you could never do for fear..has crawled their way there bit by bit. if you didnt make a tit of yourself as a child you may have to relive that lesson you missed...even if only simbolically. thats what i think anyway;} i think the point is you must be willing to risk failure foolishness even death and also to risk succeeding which often happens as m,uch by surprise as a fall!
    • thumb

      Santiago Gonzalez 500+

      • 0
      TEDx Organizer
      Nov 12 2011: So your point is that if you want to be ready for mistakes you have to try first with little ones with little consequences that you can afford at "low cost". Very sensible!
  • thumb

    Adriaan Braam 20+

    • +1
    Nov 10 2011: There is a big difference in how people, or the 'systems', react to making mistakes in Europe and North America.

    In Europe the reaction usually is: That was a stupid thing to do.

    In North America the reaction is: Who can I blame this on or sue for??

    That's why when you buy a very simple item in NA in a store, there are pages of things NOT to do with the item.
    E.g. do not use this toaster near a bathtub or swimming pool.. This coffee is hot, do not put on your lap while driving.. etc.
    The troubling part is that many of those working and thus making money in the justice system will promote their services to you (and make you rich).

    No one is perfect and we should recognize that. Many mistakes are made because of several things happening at the same moment. Often we forget we would have done the same thing in the same situation.

    So there is nothing wrong with making a mistake, but only if we learn something from it.
  • thumb

    Beste Arslan

    • +1
    Nov 9 2011: We are all scared of making mistakes....however if we dont know whats wrong ,how can we know whats right? We even learned how to walk by making mistakes,by falling,getting up ..falling again but at last on day we could stand on our own feet.Being human we arent born perfect,we learn by the trial and error method,we are expected to make mistakes.Whats the best attitude to face mistakes?....start a new page?,erase?,forget?.....no,i think we should cross out the mistake and write the right answer next to it instead.
    • thumb

      Santiago Gonzalez 500+

      • 0
      TEDx Organizer
      Nov 9 2011: So, we have to try again, learn from errors and don´t desperate. Lovely thinking and a good advise for young people. Oh it can be usefull too for middle aged. Thank you from the other shore of the mediterranean.
  • thumb

    Sunil Suthar

    • 0
    Nov 9 2011: Mistakes in life sharp or improve us to avoid failure. Mistakes creates value in mind our for each and everything we get in touch. I personally think, without Mistakes A men even can not try to be Perfect. What we learn from Mistakes is something different and above the line what we learn in our in normal manner.
    • thumb

      Santiago Gonzalez 500+

      • 0
      TEDx Organizer
      Nov 9 2011: If i haven´t misunderstood your point is that mistakes in life provide us with a different kind of wisdom, than knowledge. Thank you for your contribution!
  • thumb

    Monty Hall

    • +2
    Nov 8 2011: As an actor and improviser, the worst thing I could possibly do on stage would be to give in to my fear of failure. One of the first things I learned in my acting training was to let go of any fear or doubt that I held about myself because if I retained that fear, it would repress my imagination and inhibit my ability to totally connect with any character I portrayed. This concept has translated into my every day life. I no longer hold back or shy away from opportunity because I have learned to let go of my fear of failure, and as a result, my life has become infinitely more interesting and exciting. As you postulate, though, there comes a risk of acting foolishly when you learn to abolish this trepidation. I believe the key to letting go of fear while not becoming reckless is to know yourself and your limitations, and to not infringe too drastically upon them. At the same time, the whole point of letting go of fear is to push and test your own limitations, so you can't let yourself fall into the pattern of "Oh, I know I can't do this, therefore I won't try." As with many things in this world, you need to find a balance--in this case between risk-taking and responsibility.

    I recommend that anyone who truly wants to learn to let go of their fear of failure in a responsible manner take some sort of acting course or seminar. Acting has affected my life in a very positive manner, and I think anyone can learn and utilize the skills I have learned through training, even if they don't plan on going into theatre.
Showing all 15 comments