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In your experience, what are the three most important aspects to having a successful marriage?

There are many different opinions about what makes a marriage work. What, in your own experience, is important for the best chance of success? You can list what you’ve personally experienced or things you’ve learned from experts or friends. Give at least three examples.


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    Oct 28 2011: Communication, communication and communication
    • Oct 28 2011: u know mere communications become boring sometimes, so what shall i do if it make things worse
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        Oct 28 2011: Hi Anwar,
        If we percieve communications to be "boring", that is the reality we create. How about believing that there is always something new and interesting to learn about your partner? I believe that we change with time, and there is always something new and different we may discover if we are open to really listening.

        My x-husband and I were married for 24 years, and he always believed that he "knew" me, so he didn't listen when I wanted to talk about how I changed over the years. He "knew" me as a 20 year old women, and that is the "knowing" he wanted to stay with throughout our marriage. That was the biggest reason for me wanting to divorce. I didn't want to share my life with someone who thought talking, communicating, learning and growing together was boring.
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        Nov 1 2011: Hi Anwar,

        If you find communication boring, you might try some different skills. Communication is a skill and it can be learned (just like any other skill) and the better we get at it, the more fun, and meaningful it can become.

        But for some, it's not really "about the words" ... my Father communicated through action. It was hard for some people to hear him. To me, he "spoke" very clearly.

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