TED Conversations

Marcus Cauchi

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Why do we repeatedly do what does us harm or doesn't serve us, even when we know by doing what we've done before we'll get the same result?

Self-sabotage is rife in life, in business, in sports and in families to name a few. Experience tells me that the starting point of self-sabotage comes from toxic beliefs that were never true, aren't true any more or aren't true in 100% of cases.

Can you tell me what causes you have observed for self-sabotage in your lives or the lives of those you engage with?

If you could structure your responses around the following framework:

1. Issue or presenting symptom
2. A specific example to give context
3. Impact

And if you have learned how to replace old patterns with good patterns of thinking or behaviour:

4. How did you replace your old pattern/script or work around your self-sabotaging behaviours?


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    Sep 2 2011: Maybe sometime the desire to achieve something is so strong, much stronger than the controlling ability of our brain. And it seems that it is unlikely to kill or weaken the desire. So we might have to train our self-controlling ability and make it strong enough. Some wise guy said to us before, those brave men do feel the fear, but they choose to move on instead of giving in. In a word, the same objective facts, people have many approaches to deal with them. And how to be strong in self-controlling? People should learn it hard.

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