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Poch Peralta

Freelance Writer / Blogger,

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Can you Really Love Your Enemies?

Will the world be a better place if everyone does that? Or will it cause criminals to multiply and be worse?

'Babylonian law put an end to this. Assuming you were of the same social rank as the person you injured, the punishment had to fit the crime: an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth.

'This principle, as barbaric as it may seem today, was an important step forward for civilization. A further advance was made by Jesus and Buddha, who both, according to Robert Thurman, Professor of Buddhist Studies at Columbia University, embraced the philosophy of love your enemy...'
http://bigthink.com/big-think-tv/finding-zen-on-christmas

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  • Jan 7 2014: Something wrong with a word ' enemy' here, it doesn't match with love.
    It's like bombing for peace.
    Know your enemy and probably it won't be your enemy.
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    Jan 3 2014: It was Sun-tzu Chinese general and military strategist who said keep your friends close and your enemies closer. Keep your friends close because of the quality of your relationship. Keep your enemies closer means you need to keep them in a position where you always know what they are doing.

    I personally have a problem with the word love in reference to "my enemies". I respect my enemy and his capabilities .... but to love him under any circumstances is contrary to the term "enemy". The term "enemy" serves the social function of designating a particular entity as a threat, thereby invoking an intense emotional response to that entity. That would not include love.

    I would consider Jeffery Dahmer a enemy / threat to my family ... to love him and invite him to dinner at my house may result in becoming dinner.

    Perhaps the intent of the "love your enemies was different that the literal translation. Romans 12:19–21 Beloved, never avenge yourselves, but leave it to the wrath of God, for it is written, “Vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord.”

    I am not a biblical scholar but could the verse mean that to openly resist the Roman Army would mean certain defeat the people were admonished to give unto Caesar that which is Caesars and that which is of God to God. Isn't that saying obey the laws and remain safe. Perhaps the sayings were to protect people ... and not let hate lead you to a hasty and dangerous decision.

    Poch, As always I look for another avenue to be explored.

    Always a pleasure to reply to your conversations. Be well. Bob.
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      Jan 3 2014: The word 'enemy' is becoming a viral issue here which gave me
      the idea of starting another convo: Were spiritual icons right in saying 'Love your 'enemies'?
      Although I have given my theories on why the word was used.

      '...the people were admonished to give unto Caesar that which is Caesars and that which is
      of God to God. Isn't that saying obey the laws and remain safe...'
      I have attended a theological college for a year. Your interpretation is right. But there is a Bible
      verse harder to obey which says 'Obey your government.' Makes you wonder how Jesus did
      that and yet was murdered by political and religious leaders.

      I'm always honored by your presence sir.
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        Jan 3 2014: 'Obey your government.' Makes you wonder how Jesus did that and yet was murdered by political and religious leaders.

        Again outside of my area .... But Jesus was gathering a large following and in those days you could only serve one (whatever). The Romans demanded obedience ... religious leaders demand you follow their edicts .... to oppose either was a death warrant. They saw Jesus as competition and a threat to their power .... he was murdered to protect their rice bowls and demonstrate their power over his power. Power struggles are solved the same way today. Eliminate the enemy.
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          Jan 4 2014: 'They saw Jesus as competition and a threat to their power ....'
          Even most of Jesus' followers turned around when they found out Jesus was
          not a 'political rebel'.
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        Jan 4 2014: Yes.
  • Jan 2 2014: I refer to an old Irish saying. "Forgive those that harm you, but remember the bastards name." Active Forgiveness with active resistance. Its the most reality based balance of kindness and survival instinct.
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      Jan 3 2014: LOL Those Irish are really serious but fun!
      It's also like a Judo principle: attack while defending.

      'Its the most reality based balance of kindness and survival instinct...'
      I think that is agreeable.
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    Jan 2 2014: Here's an amazing video about No Hate activists from Jimmy:

    '...They are typically adult males between the age 18-35 but there are all kinds of followers. Now naturally they are a group that is subjected to a lot of hate by people unable to understand that grown men can like this series originally intended for young girls...'
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=olLDrvc1qt4
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    Jan 2 2014: There's a very big community, that started on the web but have now come out into the world.

    One of their mottos is "I will love and tolerate the crap out of you" in response to all the hate they get.

    They are called Bronies (Bro + Pony), and are fans of the new "My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic" series. They are typically adult males between the age 18-35 but there are all kinds of followers. Now naturally they are a group that is subjected to a lot of hate by people unable to understand that grown men can like this series originally intended for young girls.

    Here's a Know Your Meme video explaining much of this, note that for people that are not familiar with the inner workings of meme culture this might seem really, really weird. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=olLDrvc1qt4

    And yes, I am a Brony and I will love and tolerate the crap out of you!
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      Jan 2 2014: Other men turned Brony don't surprise me. But YOU lol
      I've been an animator before and was part of a group that created some of segments
      of Disney films. I was also a fan of Japanese non-porno adult cartoons. But until after
      watching your video, I didn't know that such great stories about brand cartoons existed!

      I'm gonna share your video via another comment.
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        Jan 2 2014: You can imagine MY surprise when I realized that I liked it.

        What happened was, since I feel the need to explain how this came to be, that I slept over at a friends house. He's one of my closest friends and I have great respect for his intelligence, ethics and general kindness, he's also the funniest guy I know and we can laugh at anything together, he just makes anything funny. And he usually shows me a lot of great, not-well-know, content.

        So we were pretty hungover and after breakfast we decided to just chill in front of the computer, I was prepared to view anything. So he said, you HAVE to see this. So we did. For like 3 hours and after that I had to admit that it was pretty great, had nice animations and that it also had a really good message woven into it, one of peace, love and friendship...
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          Jan 2 2014: Great story too how you came to discover Brony.
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        Jan 2 2014: There's a documentary if you'd like to learn more. It's called

        "Bronies: The Extremely Unexpected Adult Fans of My Little Pony"

        I can't share a link because of the Terms of Use, but I bet you know how to download stuff if you want to.

        At the first BronyCon (yes, it exists) there was even a separate cafeteria department for military staff that were Bronies so that they could talk with other military staff. I think there were about 100 military people there.
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          Jan 2 2014: A Brony military staff! In case push comes to shove? (joke) Well,
          well. When will Brony surprises stop?

          Yes I can hack the link if I want to. I'll do that for source reference later. Thanks.
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    Jan 2 2014: I think in most cases, it's not necessary to love your enemy or hate him. The best is to react logically and reasonably.
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      Jan 2 2014: To react logically and reasonably is an excellent choice Yoka.
      But what if the offender continually repeats his offense? You will have to do something else then.
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        Jan 2 2014: I know what you mean, I've met this kind of people before too. I think if it's too much out of line, you can react reasonably by turning to the law enforcement agencies. The point is if it's convenient and not costly for you to sue others in your country. You should collect some evidence.
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          Jan 2 2014: And that is the best and last option -- without hating.
          Kudos Yoka!
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        Jan 3 2014: Yes, being sensible instead of emotinal. Hate harms your health. Or you can just tell the person you're going to sue him to stop him doing foolish things.
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          Jan 3 2014: 'Hate harms your health...'
          Absolutely true. It feeds cancer cells. Whenever I drink liquor and someone
          makes me angry, I feel terrible the next morning. The offending person is the
          poison, not alcohol.
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          Jan 3 2014: I wholeheartedly agree Yoka....hate harms our health. I believe it produces a blockage of energy, that could otherwise flow through us...contributing to good emotional and physical health......good point Yoka!

          Poch,
          How can someone "make" you angry? Do you choose how you feel, act and react, or do you give the power to another person to "make" you feel something?
      • Jan 7 2014: Niccolo Machiavelli said that one should strike his enemy in a way that is so severe that the mere thought of revenge should send shivers down his spine.
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    Jan 1 2014: Hello again Poch:>)

    Yes, we CAN love our enemies, and it is a lot more pleasant for us than the alternative. My mom always used to say....love the person....hate the behavior, and I perceive that as good advise.

    Nadav Tropp writes..."Well, I don't know about loving your enemy, though a healthy respect and understanding of your enemy sure does make it easier to defeat them"

    To me, respect and understanding comes from a place of love, so whatever the motivation is, healthy respect and understanding are actually elements of love. We can practice respect, understanding and love of a person, and separate the behaviors that are unacceptable....make any sense?

    Another question to ask oneself, is why do we choose to label anyone an enemy? I am aware that many people do not share my thoughts, feelings, beliefs, practices, perspectives, perceptions, opinions, etc. However, I have no need to call them enemies. Loving, with a healthy respect, understanding, and compassion is a lot more enjoyable:>)
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      Jan 1 2014: I missed you Colleen. Long time no see :-)

      '...love the person....hate the behavior...'
      Like most gurus say: hate the sin not the person.

      '...why do we choose to label anyone an enemy?...'
      My answer to Greg:
      'I chose the word 'enemy' since it's the word used by spiritual gurus
      and I prefer harder questions.'

      Thank you very ma'am and have a joyful new year.
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        Jan 1 2014: Thank you Poch....that is very sweet of you, and I missed you as well. I was visiting relatives in other parts of the country, then two days after I returned home, one of my brothers died. So I've been busy with family things......not a lot of time to chat on TED.

        Love the person...hate the behavior.....or....hate the sin not the person.....yes....similar.

        One thing I observe, is that once one labels someone an "enemy", that person builds a story around their choice to call someone the enemy, and continues to reinforce those thoughts and feelings over and over again. That uses up a lot of precious time and energy by the person who needs to label someone the enemy.....don't you think? Do you perceive anything useful gained from that practice?
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          Jan 1 2014: I'm very sorry about your brother Colleen. I hope it didn't hurt much
          happening at this week of year.

          If I were as careful as you at spending energy, I will of course avoid using
          'enemy'. But I have a lot of reserve energy I need to dump somewhere lol.
          Anyway, it's still a matter of whether one lets something negative drain his
          energy or not.

          I observed that you care a lot about conserving spiritual energy. Is your
          religion or belief a minor one and related?
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        Jan 1 2014: Thank you for your kind words Poch. We lost another brother at this time last year too, so the holidays have been kind of quiet for our family the last couple years.

        I agree....it is a choice to let something drain our energy....or not. Some people perceive death to be an enemy, and sometimes allow the thought of death to drain them. I do not choose to do so, because I see it as part of the life/death/life cycle....the same as any enemy is part of our life. I say if something, or someone is going to be part of my life, I might as well learn to understand and accept.

        I do not practice a religion, and my beliefs are probably more aligned with Buddhism than any other philosophical belief. I believe in living every moment of the life adventure with curiosity and love.....pretty simple:>)
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          Jan 1 2014: '...sometimes allow the thought of death to drain them.
          I do not choose to do so...'

          Wise and I'm so glad to hear that ma'am. I accept the reality of death too
          so much that I want to buy my own coffin.

          '...my beliefs are probably more aligned with Buddhism than any other
          philosophical belief...'
          Just as I suspected. And I thought you were my lady chat friend whom
          I asked the same question and had the same answer! We three believe
          the same.
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    Dec 31 2013: I agree with Nadav, a healthy understanding and respect for an enemy can help in defeating them.
    But, personal success is the sweetest revenge of all!
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      Dec 31 2013: Yes Radha. Personal success is the sweetest revenge of all.
      But it would be more of a success if we get our enemies to our side or beliefs.
  • Dec 31 2013: Well, I don't know about loving your enemy, though a healthy respect and understanding of your enemy sure does make it easier to defeat them.

    Loving your enemy seems like something of an oxymoron though. I don't see it happening.
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      Dec 31 2013: You really impress me Nadav.
      Many battles are lost because we underestimate our enemies. So your advice of respecting
      and understanding enemies is spot on. Loving enemies is only easy if we made or caused them to be.
      • Dec 31 2013: When I was in the military I used to try to propagate respect for the enemy all the time. Propaganda and even racism, combined with a real technological disparity often made it easy to underestimate the opposition. Its easy to get overconfident, and overconfident soldiers tend to have shorter life expectancies.

        Getting inside your enemy's head and understanding their perspective is a great help. The trick is to do so without "going native" as it were, doing so without compromising your ability to kill them if needed--understanding the enemy without loving them.
        Some people would call this a brand of sociopathy, and honestly, I'm inclined to agree to an extent. The scary thing is that its a skill that can be taught to practically anyone...
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          Dec 31 2013: No wonder you were intel!
          See how our chat progressed. You started with respecting and understanding
          enemies. Which brought me to underestimating them. Which brought you to
          the subject 'overconfidence'. It would be nice if all TED dialogues run like this.

          'The scary thing is that its a skill that can be taught to practically anyone...'

          Big responsibility too since whatever we teach goes on forever which could
          glorify or ruin our names forever.
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    Jan 24 2014: Wise people say, "To err is human, to forgive is divine." Turning the other cheek ...this is extremely difficult to practice because we are human.
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      Jan 24 2014: And that's the reason why I asked 'Can you Really Love Your Enemies?'---
      can we really forgive them? Thank you Rodrigo.
  • Jan 7 2014: Similar to Bob, I have a problem with the word enemy. I am willing to work, forgive, etc. them but if they are a threat to my family then all bets are off.
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    Jan 7 2014: Hello Poch, Seems to me that the most important aspect of loving our enemies is that we love them, but don't necessarily love what they do.
    Obviously we love, or should love our kids. But here too, we have to judge or asses what they do. If we did not love them, we couldn't care less what they did.

    We should not be driven by anger, hatred and revenge for those that think, and act, worse than we do.
    That's why we should not hate a bank robber, but not like and support what he did. In fact we should send that person to jail so that he can improve himself.

    At some point we may have to overthrow someone's table. But, again, that should not be done out of hate or revenge.
    This is someone's sermon on the subject
    http://www.swedenborgstudy.com/sermons/mirror-newchurch.org/LoveYourEnemies.htm
    Thanks for your great question.
    • Jan 7 2014: Quick sidebar sir, but tell me how exactly is jail/prison improving people? If you put a wild animal in a cage for a period of time, I'm sure it won't magically turn into a calf when you let it out. Are you aware of the atrocities that happen in the jail/prison world?
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        Jan 7 2014: Good questions that should be answered.
      • Jan 7 2014: I agree with Jean. My mom and grandparents worked in the prison system and saw first hand the effects it could have on people. My grandfather was a counseler that dealt with drug addictions, many of which were started after incarceration. It is a difficult subject for me to understand and see the "right" side of, the prison system is seriously flawed here in the U.S., there is no question of that, but what is the solution? I don't think counseling and therapy is the answer for violent and sexual offenders, though maybe that would be better for those suffering addictions, and more effective than sentences in prison.
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          Jan 7 2014: Jacob,
          What I observed in 6 years of volunteering with the dept. of corrections, is that work programs can be effective in giving offenders skills which they can use when/if they are released.

          It would be great to see self sustaining villages, where inmates could learn skills, including, and not limited to, how to beneficially contribute to a community.
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          Jan 7 2014: Hi Jacob,
          That is the best question "what is the solution?"
          As punishment, it seems that fines or jail is all we have. Whether counseling and therapy are effective or can be improved, may totally depend on the person on the receiving end.
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        Jan 7 2014: Hi Jean, the idea is that there should be consequences to actions.

        Please leave animals out of this discussion. People can change their mind, what they love and do. Animals don't.

        --"Are you aware of the atrocities that happen in the jail/prison world?"--
        Are you suggesting we send criminals to a pleasant hotel in the Bahamas?
        I know probably not everyone dislikes jails because the food and the bed is better than at home, if they have a home.
        Even when we give kids a time-out (because we love them) we don't put them where they'll have a great time.
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          Jan 7 2014: Adriaan,
          You write..."Even when we give kids a time-out (because we love them) we don't put them where they'll have a great time."

          This is true Adriaan. Neither do we put them in a place where they will learn more about how to be a better criminal.

          You really think the food and the bed is better in a prison? Have you ever been in a prison Adriaan? On what do you base that statement?
        • Jan 7 2014: Cant seem to reply above.
          Adriaan, it is a tough question. One I've never been able to wrap my head around. Its too complex for me. It has to do with all kinds of factors of course. Economic inconsistancies, soiciologiacal issues, problems in our education system, glaring problems in our judicial system, where to begin?
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      Jan 7 2014: '...the most important aspect of loving our enemies is that
      we love them, but don't necessarily love what they do...'
      Yes sir. Hate the sin, not the sinner.

      'If we did not love them, we couldn't care less what they did...'
      It's funny most of us don't see or often forget that simple thing. If we 'punish' our nephews and
      nieces, only a few parents will see that we care and be grateful.

      'That's why we should not hate a bank robber, but not like and support what he did. In fact we
      should send that person to jail so that he can improve himself...'
      I'm in that actual dilemma. I can't even send the home robber to jail because he's a relative and
      all I have are circumstantial evidence.

      Thank you for joining in sir.
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        Jan 7 2014: Thanks Poch.
        That being a relative makes it difficult, in a way. But if you have valuables, I'd put them in a safe or a room only you can get into. I assume your relative would not break in.
        Doing nothing would not make that relative a better person either.

        A kind and simple mentioning, with no one else around, or question could stop it. As long as the relative gets the idea that this is about him or her becoming a better person, not about the items that are gone.
        All the best.
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          Jan 7 2014: 'A kind and simple mentioning, with no one else around,
          or question could stop it.'
          I agree Adriaan. But another reason why this is a dilemma is that the offender
          does not listen to anyone except himself---the kind of person who believes that all
          that he do is just and right.
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        Jan 7 2014: That makes it tough, and since I do not know what your options are in your environment, I cannot suggest who to get involved.
        Do you have locks on doors? Could you change them? Can you put valuable stuff somewhere else? Could you move?

        How do you reach someone that will not listen.. ? Tough indeed. Best wishes
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          Jan 7 2014: You have mentioned the solution: moving.
          But changing residence is not easily done. It's a major difficulty.
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      Jan 7 2014: Adriaan,
      You say..."That's why we should not hate a bank robber, but not like and support what he did. In fact we should send that person to jail so that he can improve himself.

      Do you have any statistics to support your statement that people who go to jail "improve" themselves?
      • Jan 7 2014: I can imagine for a number (however fractional it may be) prison is a least a roof and guaranteed meals and for a larger number, prison becomes a way of life, maybe the only way they see available to them. The problem, for me is the promise of rehabilitation and how seldom this seems to actually happen. There are programs that definitely see results but this is contingent on the inmate wanting to change and learn new ways to live. We should definitely as a society hold people accountable for their actions but our current "justice" system seems to cause as many problems as it solves.
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          Jan 7 2014: I totally agree Jacob, and I think one of the challenges, is that people often believe that prison is working. There are programs that actually work, and are cut out because many of the prisons are now privatized, and providing programs costs money, which affects the bottom line of the privately owned prisons.
      • Jan 7 2014: The privitization of the the prison system scares me. I can't argue that privitization can have a place in the real world, but the idea of a company that seeks to make money off of crime and punishment is worrisome.
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          Jan 7 2014: I agree Jacob, and privatization of the facilities does not seem like the most beneficial possibility.

          I think it is odd that in a conversation about loving our enemy, those who are incarcerated have been singled out as an "enemy". I experienced most of them as wounded people who were continuing on the path of wounding other people, which is what they often learned to do to survive in the environment they were born into.
      • Jan 7 2014: That's fair. I've actually had a couple of family members spend time in prison and I have nothing but love for them. I've got to say that i am conflicted though. If someone harmed my family they would find an enemy in me. The bars they sat behind would be the only thing keeping them safe. I can forgive a lot of things but violent crimes are not one of them. I know this is contradicting and hypocritical, but I've come to terms with it. My family and those I have love for in this world are what keep my grounded and woe be unto those that seek to harm them. Sorry thats a little intense. I thought a lot about non-violence over the years and had to admit to myself that I'm just not that evolved.
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          Jan 7 2014: Jacob,
          You say...you "know this is contradicting and hypocritical".....mmmmmmm....maybe not....

          If someone harms you or your family personally, you would consider them to be your enemy? You love family members who have spent time in prison.

          They have not personally harmed you or your family members correct? So, in your perception, a person who harms you or your family would be considered an enemy.

          I understand that and do not perceive it as contradictory....seems clear to me. You are saying that if someone harms you or your family, you would consider him/her an enemy. That is different than labeling ALL incarcerated people the enemy.
      • Jan 7 2014: No I don't consider them my enemy at all. The contradictory/ hypocritical part comes in when I cant forgive violent crime, but I would seek to do violence, and that would be a crime. Once again I have to admit that I'm not part of the solution, I'm part of the problem.
      • Jan 7 2014: I can see that for humanity to advance we would have to be willing to sacrifice greatly, as the nonviolent movements have proven. I just cant pretend to be that good a person.

        Edit: Colleen, I can feel the discomfort and disappointment in your "OH" and I'm sorry for that, I really am, but I have to be honest with myself and I want to be honest with you guys. I wish I could say I was forgiving enough and maybe I could/would be, I just don't know, and I hope I never have to find out. I enjoyed discussing this with you.
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          Jan 7 2014: Jacob,
          My "OH" is acceptance and respect of your choice for yourself.
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        Jan 7 2014: 'What I observed in 6 years of volunteering with the dept. of corrections,
        is that work programs can be effective in giving offenders skills which they can use
        when/if they are released.'

        Colleen, doesn't your factual statement prove that prison as punishment works---if used correctly?
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          Jan 7 2014: Poch,
          The rate of recidivism shows us that prison as punishment does not work.

          I believe that some work programs teach offenders skills they can use on the outside that might help prevent re-offending. Those programs have been cut....at least in this state....because it is not profitable for the owners of the privatized facilities.
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        Jan 7 2014: Ahh yes. Recidivism. The punishment is not just the problem.
        I think what the offender do after release is the bigger problem.
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          Jan 7 2014: Well Poch....believing that punishment will work to prevent re-offence doesn't seem to work.

          Yes...I agree....what the offender does after release is the bigger problem. If s/he does not have any skills to support him/herself, s/he will probably do what is familiar to him/her.
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        Jan 7 2014: 'Those programs have been cut....at least in this state....
        because it is not profitable for the owners of the privatized facilities...'
        So when this happens, there's no more option but lethal execution right?
        Any other suggestions?
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          Jan 7 2014: WHAT???
          "So when this happens, there's no more option but lethal execution....???
          Poch,
          What are you talking about?
  • Jan 6 2014: I would have to say that throughout my life, my only true enemy has been myself. I have caused my self more harm through self destructive decisions than anybody else has caused me. There are stil parts of my mind/ego that I can't come to love, but I have come to accept them as part of me. Jimmy posted an old Cherokee parable on another discussion that I always found useful. My enemy is the rabid wolf I chose to feed and follow for too long.
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      Jan 6 2014: I consider people like you who have themselves as their true enemy
      as fortunate. The solution to your problem is easier to implement. Not so with people whose
      problems come from other people. They have less power to control their problems.

      The parable of the war inside us. Yes Jacob. It's popular to all kinds of real gurus.
      • Jan 6 2014: The only way I can disagree is that it (for me) was and is easier (on my ego) to find fault in others. Its a slap in the face every time I notice that the traits and actions of others that frustrate me I can also find in myself.
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          Jan 6 2014: True. But it seems a fact that the nicer a person is,
          the more he will become a victim of abuse. We have a local saying:
          If you give your finger, they will eat your arm too, then your whole body.
      • Jan 6 2014: Thats a fair point! That's why I was always so impressed with nonviolent demonstrations. Ghandi and his marchers walking two by two intothe staffs of the army. It is beyond me. I see red when people are simply rude or inconsiderate.
      • Jan 6 2014: I should add that you are right to consider me fortunate, I am lucky that I am my worst enemy and that I don't have anyone seeking to abuse or oppress me, another fair point!
      • Jan 6 2014: I will check out your link. Great talk sir!
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    Jan 1 2014: i don't know Poch what makes them your enemy is that you don't love them, isn't it? But you can think ahead to a time when they won't be your enemy and you'll love them then, and maybe it will soften you a little in the present.

    For me in my personal life I don't think of myself as having enemies, I may conflict with people but I just think of it as a temporary conflict that will be resolved one way or another. As an American I might think my country has enemies, although even there one feels it will resolve eventually. I wonder what the difference is, maybe the conflicts one has as a member of a country are more high-stakes than one's personal conflicts?
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      Jan 1 2014: I don't like having enemies too.

      '...maybe the conflicts one has as a member of a country are more high-stakes than
      one's personal conflicts?...'

      If you have to choose between betraying your country or your friend, whom will you
      choose?
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        Jan 1 2014: Oh, I'd betray my friend I think, a country is a bigger entity and involves the welfare of a lot of people. How about you, Poch?

        Somehow when you call someone your enemy it means they'll be your enemy for life? One hopes one won't have any enemies for life? It is a strong word. Even when the U.S. goes to war I might not think of the other country as our enemy, maybe our opponent?
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          Jan 1 2014: Your country can betray you everyday but a true friend will never.
          I choose not betraying my true friend.

          Proof that I don't like enemies for life:
          'Yes Radha. Personal success is the sweetest revenge of all.
          But it would be more of a success if we get our enemies to our side or beliefs...'

          I chose the word 'enemy' since it's the word used by spiritual gurus
          and I prefer harder questions.