TED Conversations

Eliana Reyes

This conversation is closed. Start a new conversation
or join one »

What do you think are the TOP 3 personal issues that stop an individual from pursuing their life purpose and developing their talents?

For as long as I can remember I have been fascinated with studying different issues people deal with and reasons why they may not be content with their life.

I am curious to know what everyone else thinks (based on observation or personal experience).

What stops us from "living life?"
What are the main issues in life? Is it fear? doubt? low self esteem? envy?
Why do you think some people let those issues stifle their purpose in life?

Lets Talk! :)

+6
Share:

Showing single comment thread. View the full conversation.

  • thumb
    Dec 19 2013: Hi Eliana, and welcome to TED conversations:>)
    I too have always been fascinated with human behaviors....my own included!

    My answer to your question is fear, fear, fear. In my perception and experience, we are, at all times, coming from an underlying sense of love (curiosity, enthusiasm, eagerness to learn and grow, joy, compassion, respect, etc.), or fear.

    You mention fear, doubt and low self esteem as an example. In my perception, doubt, low self esteem and some other examples insightfully presented on this thread come from fear.....the fear of not "being" enough, not doing enough, or having a fear of failing in the life adventure.

    I suggest that some folks let those issues stifle their life adventure, because they may not realize that those thoughts, feelings and emotions are stifling? We cannot change something that we are not aware of, so the first step is realizing how some of the fear based thoughts, feelings and perceptions impact the life experience. If we do not do that exploration, we continue to be impacted by the underlying "programming".
    • thumb
      Dec 19 2013: Thanks for the welcome! I have missed out on some great conversation by not being part of this community sooner!

      Thanks for your reply, especially admitting that you are fascinated in your own behavior! That makes two of us!
      I love how you phrased "stifle their life adventure." Brilliant! What is an adventure but a journey of embracing the unknown, feeling the fear, but doing it anyway. I agree with you- the issue is not oftentimes the actual fear, or doubt, or (insert another issue), but not being AWARE that those feelings are blocking ones ability to live their dream.

      This brings up another passionate interest of mine- how does one awaken or challenge a persons state of unawareness? #pondering
      • thumb
        Dec 19 2013: Eliana,
        I suggest that you have not "missed out" on anything, because in my perception and experience, we discover and participate in something when we are truly ready, willing and able to do so.

        Anyway, a lot of the topics discussed on TED are repeated over and over again.....I think there is a lot to discuss in our world, and TED provides the opportunity for us to connect around the world.....I LOVE it:>)

        Regarding fascinated with my own behaviors....yes.....it is sometimes very enlightening to observe my own behaviors, because that is how I evaluate, learn, grow, possibly change something, and sometimes it is very amusing:>)
        "Blessed are they who can laugh at themselves for they shall never cease to be amused":>)

        Are you aware that there is a book by that title?
        "Feel the Fear and do it Anyway" by Susan Jeffers
        I read it years ago, and thought it was very good.

        I find that asking questions of myself, challenges me to be more aware, and I often ask questions to encourage/support others in their journey as well:>)
        • thumb
          Dec 20 2013: Colleen I can feel your warm and compassinate spirit through the screen. I just want to hug you! Thanks for your reply. I love asking questions and swimming in thoughts of possibiliies and ideas and truth!

          I am aware of that book! Its a god book indeed. And thank yu for the encouragemen that yu wrote n the very first sentence. :) Cheers!
      • thumb
        Dec 21 2013: Thank you Eliana....sending you more warmth, compassion and a hug:>)

        Let's use your comment as a little example of what we are talking about....ok?

        You write...
        "I have missed out on some great conversation by not being part of this community sooner!"

        A person can focus on that idea and repeat it over and over again in his/her mind...why didn't I do that sooner...I should have known better...bla...bla...bla. That focus can take a person on a regret/shame/blame trip. There were certainly times in my life when I discovered something that seemed to be right in front of me all the time, and I asked...why didn't I see, feel, perceive and understand that?

        For some reason, I was not ready, willing or able to embrace, accept or understand that information, on that level, at that time. So, I let go of the "should have" "could have" regret/blame scenario. As we learn and grow with the life experience, we often see things differently, based on information we are accepting at any given time...hind sight, wisdom...call it what you will. There have been many life situations I explored at various times in my life, often going to deeper and deeper understanding at different times.

        When we get stuck in, and focus on the regret/blame patterns, it prevents us from moving forward with the information which might help support and encourage learning. There is nothing wrong with having the thoughts...why didn't I do that or know that sooner. It is the holding onto those thoughts and making them our reality, that might be problematic.

        The questions that may be helpful to ask... why do I want to have regrets? Why do I want to blame myself just because I didn't notice something sooner, rather than later? Why do I want to hold onto those regret/blame feelings? You say we can swim in thoughts of possibilities and ideas.....I love that Eliana. Let go of the regret/blame mind chatter, and swim in new thoughts of possibilities and ideas....be clear with our 'self".....KNOW THYSELF:>)
        • thumb
          Dec 21 2013: Dear Colleen,
          I saw your smiling face and felt a pang. I know it's a photo but guess I am getting older :) Sorry this is absolutely out of topic.
        • thumb
          Dec 23 2013: Colleen, (hugs, love and compassion received)

          When I read your replies I feel like I'm:

          a. having an inner conversation with myself. (that is how they sound like)
          b. writing in my journal.

          That is why my responses back to you are not long becuase I feel like what you express are things I express to myself when no one is watching. Its so refreshing to see others express what you understand, but express it in such a form that it adds to your understanding. Yummy!

          And I love that you said:

          "I was not ready, willing or able to embrace, accept or understand that information, on that level, at that time. "

          I totally agree and have always believed in that idea as well. THANKS for sharing the truth of your soul. :)

          You are a wonderful soul.
      • thumb
        Dec 23 2013: Dear Pabitra,
        You are a sweet kind man....oops....I mean chimp:>) I sincerely hope the "pang" that you felt was pleasant, rather than the alternative!

        Perhaps it is not so "off topic" my friend, because in my perception and experience, it appears that some of the same fearful limitations that may stop an individual from pursuing their life purpose and developing their talents, are sometimes the same limitations that hinder genuine connections with people. Putting oneself "out there" in the pursuit of our life purpose, developing talents that support what we believe to be our purpose, and genuinely connecting with people all require a certain risk.

        What if we are rejected? What if our attempts are a mistake? What if we feel like a failure because we did not get the results we anticipate? What do you think about the idea that it takes a risk to wholeheartedly pursue our life purpose, develop talents and relationships?
        • thumb
          Dec 23 2013: Thanks Colleen :)
          The in topic response then will be:
          1. Inhibition
          2. Insecurity
          3. Infallibility

          All apply to mind and stop us from the flight of joy.
          Hugs and Merry Christmas.
        • thumb
          Dec 23 2013: Pabrita,

          Thanks for replying! Your profile picture is quite nice. That is one sassy and intellectual chimp. I wonder what he is contemplating!

          I love your above statement of the 3 I's...Delicious. And, I also agree with Colleen I LOVE THE FLIGHT OF JOY. Joy is an upward journey, one that most times starts on the lowest of grounds.
      • thumb
        Dec 23 2013: I agree Pabitra, and I love your reference to "the flight of joy"!
        Hugs and Happy Holidays to you too my friend:>)
      • thumb
        Dec 29 2013: Eliana,
        This is a reply to your comment which begins..."Colleen, (hugs, love and compassion received)"

        Thank you for your kind words my friend. It is indeed very pleasurable to connect with so many people who seem to be on the same page, same book, same library! I am very grateful to TED for providing the wonderful opportunity:>)

        Wishing you more love and hugs in the new year!

Showing single comment thread. View the full conversation.