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greg dahlen

Alumnus, academy of achievement

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what do you do in your pajamas and bathrobe?

One day I was tired and was staying home most of the day. I realized I needed to go to the market across the street for a few things, but then I would come home again and stay home. I asked myself should I change from my pajamas to go to the market, but then I thought I would just have to change back when I returned home. So I just went to the market in my pajamas and bathrobe. True, it drew some giggles, but people seemed to be laughing with me, not at me.

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    Nov 15 2013: Greg, The reality is that sleeping pants are sold almost everywhere ... they are patterned light weight sweat like pants. The sad truth is that many wear them as clothing.

    From a older persons view ... I think it is trashy and disrespectful to go shopping in ones underclothes ... which I consider PJs and Bathrobes. They are bought for a purpose and grocery shopping is not one of them.

    My image would be that you slept in those PJs, maybe got up in the night or early morn and went to the toilet or even scratched where you itched, Got a cold blow or pick you nose ... Since you still have them on I think you have not bathed. If you had you would not have put on soiled cloths. (I hope)

    Picking up the paper from your porch or setting the trash out is one thing when you are covered up but still in night cloths ... however, shopping and spreading your germs is disrespectful, self centered, and most likely infecting all you touch and those who follow using your basket or buying what you touched including the money.

    I have spent enough time in California to understand that convention is not always followed by some. That is their business .... however, you ask the question of TED members of which I am one and have given you my view.

    As a former employer ... you stayed home because you were tired?????? Just for laughs what did you tell your boss was the reason you did not go to work? If this was not a work day disregard.

    As a side bar .... is this considered indecent exposure in California? I will have to look that up.

    Lejan ask about "Asking to be raped" ... it is common for ladies to not wear restrictive underwear to bed ... by appearing in public in sleep wear you allow that thought to be processed by both the good and bad people and that will be their perception of you. It may be a unfair brand that she is trash ... but it will be thought if not said.

    Thoughts from a old guy .... Bob.
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      Nov 15 2013: thanks, Robert. Well, I would think I disagree with your positions, but appreciate your sharing. I read somewhere that the average American bathes once a week, therefore even if one is in one's day clothing, one may very well not have bathed. And of course one goes to the toilet, picks one's nose, etc., in one's day clothing.

      Not a work day, or perhaps working at home.

      I doubt it is considered indecent exposure. Do you happen to know what the rationale is for those laws, Bob? I used to think that it was shame over the genitals, but now I wonder if the concern is simply that a naked person might sit down on something (in public) and get urine or fecal matter on it. This would not be a problem if one is in one's pj's and bathrobe (I myself also wear briefs under my pajama pants when I sleep.)

      Yes, I think people might be very hard on a woman who did this, it's a bit unfair but that may be the way it is. Why do women get a harder time on this, in some situations we allow women to rebel against conformity more than men, and in other situations we cut men more slack.

      I am a person who enjoys being different. But I also believe most people who saw me at the grocery in my PJ's would realize it was probably some sort of time-saving attempt, to save a clothing change or two. But I like breaking out of the rut of always doing things the same way, somehow that is mentally stimulating.

      Do you ever get into a rut, Robert? What do you do to break out of it?
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        Nov 17 2013: "somehow that is mentally stimulating". So your breakout of your "rut" wearing pajamas instead of street clothes was mentally stimulating ? Hmm, interesting. Can you tell us what kind of mental stimulus you experienced walking into the grocery store wearing your pajama ?

        Just being different for the sake of being different ?

        I don't know what people thought when they saw you, but I can tell you what I would think. They guy is nuts.
        But then who knows, I'm not living in CA.
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          Nov 17 2013: no, Harald, it wasn't being different for the sake of being different. The idea was that I started the day in my pajamas, I decided I needed to do this one errand, which was go to the market across the street and buy a few things, and then I would be coming back to my place (as opposed to doing other things out in the world) and spending the rest of the day at my place. And then, when night fell, I would go to bed in my pj's. It didn't make much sense to me to change into day clothing just to do this one errand, and then I would have to change back to go to bed that night. So it's two costume changes just to make a short trip to the grocery, but I saved the effort of those changes by just staying in my pj's. How is it mentally stimulating? Well, I guess it's interesting to see how people react to one's doing something different, in America one rarely or never sees one at market in their pj's so one might wonder how people would handle it. In my imagination I imagined it would be fine, tolerated, acceptable, but it was nice to see that in reality it was that way, that people seemed to find it amusing but in a nice way, where they were smiling with me rather than at me, including the employee who rang me up at the checkstand.

          Had you seen the response from the woman from China who said it is something of a trend in China for people to go to market in their pj's and bathrobe?

          This idea was not something I came up with on my own. I had seen characters go to market in their pj's on television shows, and I said to myself "aha, I could do that in real life."

          Do you ever do anything that really is different from what other people do but you have a rationale for it?
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        Nov 17 2013: "Had you seen the response from the woman from China who said it is something of a trend in China for people to go to market in their pj's and bathrobe?"

        We never see people wear bathrobe in the wet markets in Shanghai( I think Chinese people prefer pajama) because it's inconvenient and dirty in the wet market. And the fact is more and more people consider wearing pajamas out as kind of inappropriate behavior for a citizen in a metropolis like Shanghai. So that's the difference.

        If you don't mind other people's views or discussions on your wearing pajama out and you're sure your pajama is clean enough when you return to home, of course you can try it because there're no laws or regulations to restrict your freedom.

        I think trying the opposite will also ben fun. Wearing something that is formal than pajama or bathrobe but informal than a business suit and comfortable regardless you are at home or out is more convenient and can avoid some misunderstandings from others. You can wear something casual and comfortable instead of pajama or bathrobe when you sleep. You can start your day in other comfortable clothes and sleep with them.
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          Nov 17 2013: well, even if it was a trend before, but not a trend now, Yoka, it's still different from the United States, I was just trying to make the point that different cultures might see the same act differently. Actually I got a post from a guy in California today who said he was just at a market in his pajamas and another person was the same way, this is a new one on me, as I'm the only person I've ever seen do this in the United States. I think he might be in the military and live near a military base, but what is the connection to going to the market in your pajamas?

          Yes, you can play with clothes. Probably in general that's what I'm emphasizing in this topic, a sense of play. Now you're an adult, does play fit anywhere in your life?

          I would say for me the opposite of pajamas might be the most formal clothing, such as a tuxedo and tails. That would also be a little funny, going to the market in a tuxedo, but one could do that for a practical reason as well, if one were on one's way to a very formal affair and needed something at a market.

          Sometimes I'll wear a shirt and tie to a rock music concert, this is fun, too, as it goes against what most people wear to rock music which is jeans and Tshirt. For me there's something fresh about doing something a little differently, it freshens things up, gets away from the staleness of just doing the same way.

          Now what is your image, you are a teacher correct? Here in the United States we have a holiday called Halloween where everybody dresses in costume, ordinary people dress as policemen, clowns, basketball players, nurse and doctor and go to party. Do you have this in China? What would you dress as on Halloween?
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        Nov 17 2013: I don't think you talk about the same thing in my former comment. I mean if you wear a pajama or bathrobe out because it's convenient for you to go for errand without changing your clothes,and the premise is you don't want to arrest people's attention on your clothes and feel easy with your dressing freedom, then you could wear something casual but more formal than pajama or bathrobe. You can get fun by wearing your casual clothes to sleep instead of pajama or bathrobe.

        If you want to have fun or see people's response or interesting facial expressions about your unexpected dressing style in public, you can try everything you want. Maybe you needn't wear any clothes at all. That'll be the most convenient for you to go out and surprising to people. So why don't you wear your birth suit out?:)

        We don't have Halloween in China. Chinese people don't like ghosts and zombies. We always have some rituals at some festivals to drive all the ghosts off as faraway as possible.
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          Nov 18 2013: well, Yoka, probably it's more comfortable to sleep in pajamas, also sleeping puts wrinkles in your clothes, no, so I don't wish to wrinkle what I'm going to wear, also I don't always plan my day ahead very well, in some cases I don't know that I will wake up and wish to spend the day only in my place.

          Well, in America I think you would be arrested and go to jail if you went out naked. I asked police once why you can't go out naked, she said it would be upsetting to children, I cannot think that it would be, what do you think?

          Well, every culture seems to be different, although on Halloween it's not all ghosts and zombies, it's many positive images like doctor, policeman, ballerina. It is a chance for self-expression. Perhaps you can discover more aspects of your personality by choosing a costume? Have you ever acted on stage, that is a little like Halloween, or do you disagree?
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        Nov 18 2013: Greg, well, I can't really identify with you because in general I don't use the same clothes for several days in a row and much less do I use the same clothes I wear on the road also in the bed.
        As of people smiling when they saw you. I probably would smile too. There isn't really anything to be angry about. I think I would also smile about somebody running around naked with a big Mexican sombrero and cowboy boots. Does that mean I think such an outfit is normal ? Absolutely NO.
        As to wearing pajamas in China. Well, Yoka is from Shanghai and she would know what is normal there.
        Beside, even if everybody in China uses a pajama when visiting a grocery store, it doesn't really mean anything. You are not in China but in California. There are some indigenous tribes deep in the Amazon forest that run around naked. Does that mean you should try to emulate them in California ? Probably not such a good idea.
        I do things differently form other people if there is a reason to do so and if it gives me some kind of benefit. As I said before, being different for the sake of being different is pointless.
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          Nov 19 2013: right, Harald, but it's not being different just for the sake of being different. Let's say you rose from bed one morning in your pajamas, and you knew you were going to stay home all day, work at home or rest or whatever. Noone was scheduled to come see you. And, when the day was over, you would be going to bed in your pajamas that night. You might decide to stay in your pajamas all day, right?, I'm sure you've done that in your life, stayed in your pajamas all day, most people have. But then you realize, well, I do have one small errand I should go out and do today, but then I'm going to be home the rest of the day, and at the end of the day, I will be laying down to sleep in my PJ's. Might it not make sense to just stay in your pajamas to go do the errand rather than change into your clothes to do it, it would save you the effort of changing into your clothes, you would enjoy the comfort of being in your pajamas when you returned from the errand, you wouldn't have to change back into the pajamas for bed when night fell. Those would be big good reasons to just stay in your pajamas to go do that one errand, agreed? Of course most people would change into clothes, I'm just saying it would be an option to just remain in the pajamas.

          As far as people smiling, I would say you have a feeling when people are smiling because they think you're strange, versus smiling because they're in on the joke. The smiles I got seemed positive, like more of the latter.
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          Nov 19 2013: I would also think it's refreshing to see someone dressed differently, both for the person dressing differently and for the people who see him or her. If all your life when you went to market you had only seen people dressed in day clothes, would it not delight the eye to see someone in their pajamas and bathrobe, break up the monotony? Sometimes I'll put on a shirt and tie just to go to a movie in an ordinary movie theater, or to go to a rock concert. This is refreshing for me, and I think for anyone who sees me. If all your life when you went to a movie theater you had only seen guys in shirts and t-shirts, would it not delight your eye to suddenly see someone in a shirt and tie, break up the monotony? Of course I think people should do what they feel comfortable and natural with.

          If I had a tuxedo, I might put it on some time to go to a movie in an ordinary movie theater. If I were a woman, I might put on an elegant ballgown in the same situation. It is in the spirit of play and freshness.

          Well, do you dress up for Halloween, Harald? What do you go as? Done any acting? I've sometimes worked as an extra in TV and movies, I've been different kinds of space aliens on some of the "Star Trek" spinoffs, I've been a zombie on "It's Always Sunny in Philadephia."
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        Nov 19 2013: Greg, actually I don't spend the whole day in PJs regardless of my activity. As I said, I don't spend days sticking around in the same clothes. I don't know about you, but I take at least ' shower per day and often up to 3. When I take a shower I never dress the same clothes I used before.
        "would it not delight the eye to see someone in their pajamas and bathrobe"
        Not really, I couldn't care less what people wear. I suppose, in my life there are more important things to focus on than what somebody is wearing. Steve Jobs was wearing jeans and a black turtle neck, day in day out (I assume he changed the turtle neck on a daily basis). Never heard anybody complaining that this is boring.
        I think you are overestimating your "impact" on people. I'm sure the majority of people just don't give a damn.....lol
        No, I'm not dressing up for Halloween. I'm happy with who I am, No need to change identities to become a zombie or alien ;-)
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          Nov 20 2013: Well, Harald, if you shower every day, then this idea might not be as useful to you. I shower almost every day, but once in a while am tired and don't. But if you ever find yourself on a day where you don't take a shower, for example, you are just tired, the idea might become useful. But at least where I live, it does take some courage, as by doing it you are different.

          Actually, though, I could imagine a day where I intended to shower, but I felt like doing my marketing first. In that case I might go in my pajamas to the market, which is across the street, buy food and come home, then shower, put on day clothes and do my day.

          When I said delight the eye, I did not mean you would focus on it, I only meant in a passing glance you might see it, and the variety might interest you. But if not, that's okay, too, I am doing this for practical reasons and only incidentally might it be aesthetically interesting.

          But are you really not interested in what people wear, this to me is interesting as I go about my day to see how people outfit themselves, how clothes relate to what they are trying to accomplish or what they say about their personality.

          If someone really wore the jeans and black turtleneck day in and day out, that could be an interesting choice, too. I would say it is about doing what comes naturally.

          Well, again, my main purpose in wearing PJ's to market is a practical one, it's to save the effort of two wardrobe changes, or to delay a wardrobe change when that is what I want to do. Perhaps most people don't give a damn.

          Well, I generally don't dress up for Halloween either. When I have, I have enjoyed it, it was fun to slip into a character, to feel different from the way I feel most of the time.

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