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Yijia Chen

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What was the darkest depression in your life and what have you learned from it?( i admire your courage )

I know that from tragedy has come a lot of happiness.
I know that no trees can stretch its branches in the heaven before its roots in the hell.
I guess i am young and not experienced,of course i have been through difficulties and struggles,but they are just small ones.
I would love to see someone share his/her experience with me,i am always perpared to listen.
And remember,everyone has his own depression,you are not alone.
I appreciate your participation,one really needs courage to talk about this.

Topics: courage
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  • Oct 1 2013: I would say I'm in the darkest depression of my life right now, I've been dealing with it for really as long as I can remember. I avoided the truth for a long time, honestly my story is extremely similar to Kevin's. I tried to hide in plain sight through most of high school, seemingly happy on the outside for the benefit of others I guess, when in reality I was drifting away further and further with each day. Went to Olemiss my freshmen year, did the fraternity thing, did the party thing, have a bunch of friends loved the school, but something was off and long story short, everything I had been holding back came up at once, I ended up in court ordered 72hr suicide watch in bum**** MS. I had everything I had wanted, I knew it was weird I felt no joy or happiness, but I chose to ignore it because I don't understand it and I was afraid to let anyone find out.
    It's been almost a year since I was pulled out of school and I'm no better if not worse, but in all of the group therapy, and doctors and drugs and whatever else they could. After all that I have discovered two things
    1. Couldn't have said it better then kevin did: depression is so very different from sadness or laziness or all the things that most people think of, I URGE anyone who thinks they may be feeling that way, (and believe me when you experience it you will know, there's no confusing it with the "I've been having some bad luck lately".). Anyway I urge you to please do not hesitate at all to reach out too someone., and try to head it off before you fall into the infinite pit that is complete and total apathy.
    2. I went to group therapy for awhile, which at first I was so against, but I know recommend. when I first went I was afraid that the " demons " that haunted me wernt anywhere near as significant as some of the people I would meet. Which brings me to the second thing I have learned in this long road.
    No matter whether your starving kid from the street or a wealthy person EVRY1 is =
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      Oct 1 2013: Brentley,i appreciate your sincere words.And I can definitely identify with you.
      Remember,don't be shameful for depression and vulnerability,they are just another way of showing COURAGE. And then it becomes easier:When there is a will,there is a way.
      Do you feel better right now?
      Best wishes.:)
      • Oct 2 2013: i wish! I think the biggest problem with me at this stage is ive lost the will to fight, there is a video on here that describes almost exactly what i feel like right now.

        kevin breel: confessions of a depressed comic.

        if you have a chance to check it out, the part where he talks about, the overwhelming apathy, and losing the will to fight it. that would help explain my situation.
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          Oct 3 2013: My question actually came from the talk you mentioned.
          I believe Kevin in the talk do not suffer from depression right now.
          I think what he is trying to express is not focused on the depression part.It's more than the negative that you are suffering from the depression,it's the positive that you understand the value of it.Bucause that's what life is all about:you suffer and you grow.
          Happiness depends on perspectives.Change your mind a little bit,you don't have to pursuit those "greatest" happiese,sometimes even tiny little change can make us smile.

          I strongly recommend a book to you,it's called "Tuesdays with Morrie".It talks about death and love and much much more.
          Here are some quotes:
          When you learn how to die, you learn how to live

          Their wealth did not buy them happiness or contentment.

          Everyone knows they will die, but no one through it all.

          Compared to death,depression really doesn't matter.
          I believe you will finally defeat the depression someday.Maybe not right now,but definitely someday in the future:)Hopefully my words can make a difference.

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