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Kat VonTesla

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How to let go of your old/past self

After doing a great deal of digging over the past five years or so, I've found countless books and articles on advice you'd give yourself in your childhood, teens years, 20's, etc. I've also found articles on how to plan for your future and how to visualize what you want as well as a sort of "plan of attack" in doing so. But there seem to be little to no resources out there for how to just be in your own skin, presently. I honestly don't have advice for my younger self. I had some good and bad times. And with my ego as a child/teen, I wouldn't have listened anyhow ;) I have some great plans for the future... but my problem has always been in comparing my current self/partner/job/physique/lifestyle to the one I had (nostalgic "had", not actual). I'm always trying to get back to who I am. But that "am" doesn't fit who I honestly AM now. I'd love to hear how others get in touch with reinventing their current self and how to acknowledge, honor and then let go of the old self without it feeling like some kind of a death.

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    Sep 1 2013: This is a great topic to bring up. Who doesn't want to be more proactive in shaping who they are and trimming off what they no longer are. Maybe the depressed and downtrodden but there is a way for them too. My thoughts almost immediately, went to the 12 steps of Alcoholics Anonymous, which has been a help to myself. Even if you are not an alcoholic, an applied modification of the 12 steps could give you the benefits of ridding yourself of undesirable behaviors. For instance, one could take the first step and say that they were powerless over material possession, that their life had become unmanageable in the acquisition of things. There is the searching and fearless moral inventory of yourself in step 4. In Step 8 one makes amends to others that have been wronged. The higher power concept is unique for everyone hence the "as we understood him" after the word God. http://www.silkworth.net/aa/12steps.html
    The 12 steps may seem like a stretch to some but if it can work for them, I'm confident it could be a help to almost anyone tired of who they used to be.

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