TED Conversations

Jorge Contreras

This conversation is closed. Start a new conversation
or join one »

What would be the family structure of the future?

People are in constant movement, nowadays is many examples of married couples living and working around the Globe both coming from opposite sides of the World, having very little time to spare for their family, will economics and logistics will influence on the future structure of the family?

0
Share:
progress indicator
  • Aug 1 2013: Yes.

    People are sacrificing family life for lifestyle.

    You see the results in the divorce rate, juvenile delinquency courts, and substance abuse programs.

    Long term, people will stop wanting to have children and live hedonistic life styles dedicated to themselves.

    This mentality takes exactly one generation to be removed form the gene pool.

    we are looking for instant satisfaction, quick solutions to problems, early retirements, and letting our investments work so we don't have to work. We are losing the work ethic, patients, grit and integrity required to successfully raise children. We are looking to education facilities, day care facilities and grandparents to raise OUR children.

    We are becoming less proactive about solving our own problems and more ready to be a victim some way shape or form to extort money or sympathy from those around us. We are immediately looking to blame our kids, teachers or the education system when our kids do not excel in some subject. We are adverse to being held accountable for our actions and try and get away with as much as possible or win at any cost. We seem to worship consumption of alcohol, sexual innuendos and gigiloish behavior. We buy our way out of problems that should be solved by being held accountable or never become problems in the first place by demonstrating strength and control of character and emotions.We seem to be willing to forgive our athletes, politicians, and sports heroes for acting like criminals, but throw the book at people committing crimes while trying to survive and never forgive those trying to recover from bad decisions leading to confinement. These lessons are being learned by our children as they watch our actions.

    Most adults know right from wrong, they just need to choose to live a life that serves as an example for their children.This takes work, sacrifice, and strength of character. Adults need to be willing to do these things to hold the family together.
    • thumb
      Aug 4 2013: Robert if you could shape a model how will it be?
      • Aug 4 2013: I do not think the ideal model of family structure of the future will change substantially from the current model, or the model of past generations. This model will be a pair of parents that love each other and their children unconditionally, extended family that supports the marriage and the children it produces. However, with longer life expectancy and more difficult job environments, the number of grandparents living in homes will increase and the amount of time spent by children leaving the home to go out on their own will also increase.

        What do I think are the roles in the ideal model? Both parents first do what is necessary for the family to survive, including what is needed to make the marriage survive. Parents need to decide what is the best combination of time spent earning a living vs time spent raising children. In this discussion, the value of quality time spent with children as they learn and grow needs to take precedence over growing family wealth during these formative years. In the event a family can not survive on one income, then options involving child care or assistance from other extended family members might be considered.

        I think family models tend to be influenced by many external influences and they need to be strong to be able to handle the peaks and valleys of life. The stress of living on the edge of your credit limit, having two chaotic schedules involving work hours and travel, and trying to balance daycare, healthcare and economic turmoil is a survival challenge to the basic family units. The trade-off associated with having two parents working to improve lifestyle while sacrificing child care and adding stress to the family is a subtle threat to the survival of marriages. This needs to be considered carefully in plans made by parents for the survival of the family.
        • thumb
          Aug 5 2013: Thanks Robert, I m glad you are taking part of this conversation, when I look around I see many friends asking them selfs what is the best way to form a family?
          some of them say "I have sacrifice my future in order to have a "family" both male or female have this dilema of wasted time and their youth,, It feels many people have experience separation after 8 or 10 years of marriage and they feel lost when "family" is not longer present.
          I also see many singles traveling, working, and just going trough life with empty hearts..
      • thumb
        Aug 5 2013: .Thanks!

        I would "shape a model"
        close to the 10,000 years ago norm
        in our DNA.

        Such as:

        "...
        a. Husband
        The husband half is biologically assigned in charge of food-seeking, habitat constructing, defending, donating all kinds of co-body-safety messages ceaselessly to his wife (kissing, embracing, and so on) .
        His ability and smartness come mainly from the ceaseless intimate encouragement of the other half of the marriage ---- the wife.
        b. Wife
        The wife is biologically assigned in charge of the child bearing, child bring up, house hold, and etc.
        She transfers all the physical substantial materials from her own body into the baby’s. Also, she exhausts all her spiritual energy to bring up the baby or child ---- the DNA-carrier of both the husband and wife.
        That is where her mother-greatness and beauty come from.
        Her beauty and virtue are support-enhanced by the ceaseless intimate co-body message from the other half of the marriage ---- the husband.
        This is the right way that the husband and wife of a marriage work; and the right way that happy life of the couple comes from.
        Then, there will be no issue of gender equality at all.
        ....
        "

        (Be Happy Validly! p 19).
        • thumb
          Aug 5 2013: What has made this model change over the times? if it all ready existed what happend on the way?
  • thumb
    Aug 6 2013: .
    Hi Gorge Contreras,
    Thanks!

    My answer:

    (1) Invalid (harmful) happiness "has made this model change over the times'.
    (2) "On the way", people will recognize and quit the invalid happiness
    or let new technology quit it.


    Or else?
    • thumb
      Aug 6 2013: what is your personal choice if you feel like sharing? thanks
  • thumb
    Aug 4 2013: This is such an important subject I wish to hear more your points of view.
  • Aug 3 2013: I agree that the family structure is already undergoing changes that tends to become almost "individualized" in the sense that even in a "big" family consists of a rich parent(s) with many "children" are taking their time with their own friends through electronic media. So not only there are less and less old-fashioned getting together at a dinner table, or an after dinner chat, everybody are just like living in a hotel with other unrelated guests. In poor families, the parent(s) actually doesn't have anything to talk with their children anyway.
    So, like Wayne was saying, because of the economic problem as well as the increasing proportion of elderly among us, we should seriously consider the multi-generation family structure where at least the very young children would have someone to talk to, or to gather some infomation about the social values and responsibilities.
    I have read that there are some housing projects which have built buildings for multi-generaton dwellings to accommodate M-G families. However, there are practical difficulties of putting M-G families with blood relations "under one roof". Furthermore, even with families with modest financial capability, it would still cause lot of inconvenience to its younger generation to be solely responsible to care for a handicapped elderly all year long.
    I suggest a reasonable solution that we should build a series of condominiums which will put a group of elderly with a group of healthy middle aged young parents on the same floor, but in separate wings. The members in the condo may or may not be blood related at all. But they could be considered as "adopted" grannies and grandchildren. The condo should be equipped with conveyors and hospital type of beds for the elderly, and food and laundry services for everybody. The unemployed parents or teenagers could also serve for the condo managers, service workers and caretakers, etc. with pay. The sharing of facility and caretaking by all, makes more economic sense.
  • Aug 3 2013: i believe because of the structural change in the economy there will be 4 models of the family structure

    1. Multiple generations under 1 roof. The grand parents own the home and the children can not afford childcare nor a house. The grand parents watch the children while both parents are working.

    1.1. Multiple generations under 1 roof with a single parent with children and grand parents.

    2. Single family with both parents working, probably away from the rest of the family - grand parents and siblings- due to job. It could be that the parents do not work in the same city or one travels a lot.

    2.1. Single parent with children.

    3. Only 1 parent works and 1 parent stays home.

    I believe that the number of families following 3 is decreasing.
    • thumb
      Aug 3 2013: Wayne, some of your examples like 1 and 1.1 are happening due to Immigration many of these people have create new relationships, just confirming that humans were ever they go they need a sence of family.
      • Aug 3 2013: yes but it is also happening today in the us. 38% of the individuals between the ages of 21-30 are living with their parents due to economy.
        • thumb
          Aug 4 2013: Wayne how do you see the future? if it was way to see it trough your eyes what would you see?
      • Aug 4 2013: I would say the future is 1 and 2 with 3 fading away for the majority of families. 1 to save money where the parent or parents are earning very little and 2 because of the economy, people have to go where the jobs are.
  • thumb
    Aug 2 2013: Yes Economics will continue to influence .
    • thumb
      Aug 4 2013: ok, how do you see the future Salim?
      • thumb
        Aug 5 2013: The impact will be varied in different part of the world as the economic condition is not homogenous through out the world.

        In developing world and underdeveloped world to which I belong , with improving economic conditions will drive nuclear families in large scale because of higher cost of living as it happened to the developed economy.
  • Aug 2 2013: Hello Jorg! Once I only want to live in my country because it is pleasure to live. But I realized that my wishes could not be last. The world is getting closer and smaller, connecting both you and me, resulting in "us". Someday, I have to leave my hometown and work globally.
    So it is hard to remain family structure as it was (externally) -Mom, Dad and children. They will live with pursuing their own lives. Unless their sincere hearts toward family change in a wrong direction, the family structure would remain intact, I think:) Most important thing in relationships is mind not physical distance.
    • thumb
      Aug 2 2013: Will Ethics and Morals will have to change as well ??
      • Aug 2 2013: Sure:) Ethics and Morals also depend on human beings' thought. . They are the ones who decide what are standards, laws and conventions.However, something like 'why humanity exists' will not change because it is core of presence of human beings.
        • thumb
          Aug 2 2013: Sophia, I agree, dont you think from the start it was sence of community and family, all they care was food and to stay away from danger, Right now It feels like everyone who is able to wear on "earphones" don't need to interact with anyone, it feels like they have gain their independence, Ignoring every social code.
          This evolution is scary, family structure in my opinion give us a good example to care about others.
        • thumb
          Aug 2 2013: Are you sure you understand all the family structure of today? If not, then how exactly would you understand that of the future. We have more 200 countries, and a not yet understood set of culture in the world. But buy I large, the family structure of the future won't be much different than today for our mind is the one that shape every thing we do, and it hadn't change for the last recorded 10.000 to 65.000 years.
      • Aug 2 2013: "Evloution is scary." Yes, I agree, Jorge. Most korean people are obsessed with their digital devices and smart phones anywhere. When I take a subway, all people wear on earphones, only staring at smart phone's screen. We have to try to pay more attention to others because we are all connected together. Your problems could be those of mine. Right :)?
  • thumb
    Aug 1 2013: .

    It will be unhealthy structure
    if we still pursue invalid (harmful) happiness.
    • thumb
      Aug 4 2013: if you could desing an structure for the future how will you have it done?