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Love Me or ELSE!!! Why has it come to this? Forcing generations to care for each other.

Recently we learned that China enacted a new law which stipulates that children must often go home to see their parents.

This is because parents have taken their children to court for abandonment.

Here is a link to the Chinese news piece.
You can use Google translate to read it.


And here is the Yahoo news piece:


So, what do you think?

Should the government get involved in this situation?
Would you sue your child if he did not come to visit you?
Can we force our family to love us?

What do you think of all this?

If you are from China and know information that can help us understand this issue better, please comment below.

Thank you so much!!


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    Jul 6 2013: Mary,thank you for bringing out this in-depth conversation.As a Chinese point of view,this law is understandable,but the limit of its enforceability is self-evident.There is no specific red line,parents's flexibility and longing for care vary.

    However,I can provide some pressing and deep cause of it coming to this situation.First,one child policy accounts for the cumbersome burden on every single young adult,no other sibling can give a hand to share the care.Some young couples have to carry four parents,from each side.Second,the increasing fierce competition throughout the society. Provided young employees have the impulse and need to come home to see parents,but the loss can be devastating,they might lose out to their competitor,losing a high-paying job.On the other side,their employers have compulsory obligation to give them an extra holiday,to be credible,employers have to survive also.Third,high travelling expense.Tickets,food,even hotel on the way back are unaffordable to some migrant worker,the truth is those who migrate to find a job,are mostly from poorer family. Also,there is a cultural transition ongoing, in traditional Chinese's eyes,filial piety is the foundation of all virtues,which props up the whole system of society and governance,as Confucius underlined it.But,after a 30-year opening up and rapid growth,the foundation of virtues changed,but we are confused and directionless on what might be the best replacement of filial piety.

    There are definitely more causes,like the lack of education,people's sense of morals collapse when their brain is dominated by the pursuit of money.

    I personally pretty supportive for this law.There is a flip side,when we are children,there are laws protect us more tightly than our parents,laws stipulate that our parent must meet their obligations as guardians.When we commit some crimes our parents are inevitably responsible because of their neglect.Our laws and morals drive everyone to care for the vulnerable.
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      Jul 6 2013: Thank you Jaden for your insight. Here are some points you bring out and my subsequent questions:

      ** "First, one child policy accounts for the cumbersome burden on every single young adult,no other sibling can give a hand to share the care"

      Do you think perhaps China will change this policy?

      ** "Increasing fierce competition throughout the society"

      Why the "increase" of fierce competition? Are not employees allowed to sue employers for wrongful termination of employment?

      ** "the truth is those who migrate to find a job are mostly from poorer family."

      Do not the neighbors help each other out Jaden? If a poor elderly couple is left alone, and the son goes away, do not the neighbors in their village or town care for the elderly?

      And do the sons and daughters that go away to work, do they send money back to the parents Jaden?
      Do they at least take care of the parents financial need?

      ** " but we are confused and directionless on what might be the best replacement of filial piety."

      Let me ask you Jaden, what about love? Love is a worldwide principle. It has nothing to do with Confucius, it is a human need...........we need to give and receive love.........at any age.

      And another question..........how widespread is this problem of elderly abandonment?
      Are there any statistics?

      ** "Our laws and morals drive everyone to care for the vulnerable"

      This is a good thing, isn't it? But, it is hard to legislate people's hearts Jaden.
      For this we need a superior kind of knowledge and values which surpass government mandates.

      I look forward to reading any additional information you have for us.
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        Jul 7 2013: Here are my answers,some of them might be my own understanding.

        One child policy shouldn't be abolished in the near future,we can't afford population growing rapidly,which is already 1.3 billion.Candidly and historically,one child policy benefits China tremendously in the long term.I will let yourself to imagine live in a country where its population extremely excessive. One child policy is a successful move now,but it has to be swept in the end,state should let people decide on their own how many children they want.As time goes by,the expense of raising child rockets up,people receive more education,they tend to have less children than previous generations. Currently,there has been a great debate over the legitimacy of one child policy.

        Let me give you some details that the phrase 'one child policy' can't provide. This policy is quite flexible among different people and places.In the region I live,

        1.Families whose first child is a girl,they can legally have their second child.

        2.The couple that both husband and wife come from one child family,they can have two children regardless of gender.

        This policy is also flexible,to ethnic minorities,disabled people,they have more freedom than common people in choosing how many children to have.

        I don't mind tell you, that I have a brother,seems illegal? But here I am,safe and legitimate. I have a friend,who has 5 siblings,I can't imagine,but his mother moved from place to place to give birth,in order to escape the authority and without being punished.His parents' goal was to have a boy, despite they had four girls bore previously.
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          Jul 8 2013: Jaden, thank you for shedding further light into the One Child Policy.
          It is interesting, I did not realize a lot of what you have shared.

          Thank you so much.

          I am short of time.
          But I will read the links you provided, and come back and comment later.
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        Jul 7 2013: 'Are not employees allowed to sue employers for wrongful termination of employment?',since I have no knowledge about this case,I won't add any information so as not to mislead you.

        Neighbors certainly will help when someone is in need,whereas the limit is obvious,that they can't expect their neighbors to play a child's role,they can't provide much emotionally and financially.The state has Basic Living Allowances,but only few of us are eligible to receive the allowance,in my village,all the old alone people who have no children receive it.

        Sons and daughters,my knowledge,99% send money back,their basic obligation is to support their parent financially,but somewhere along the line,due to some cause,their performance deteriorate.However,as parents and children,blood is thicker than water,the bond is out there,which means emotional obligations are relatively more crucial than finance among families.Actually, the parents come to the stage of suing their children,they are in desperate need of tangible support,like money,food,daily life care,etc. But I believe what visiting parents often creates is the bond,emotion,love,that they also short for.

        I think love is the ultimate principle,even filial piety is one of the forms of love. The question is love is so boundless and penetrating that we don't know where to start?I think if we pinpoint some smaller spirit maybe easier to practice. I see the educational system and principle really put patriotism upfront. I personally uphold the traditional principle filial piety,diligence,frugality,gratitude,and some fresh elements like equality and freedom.

        I'm looking for the statistics,will give when I find.Here are links relate to this issue,you can google translate them,



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