TED Conversations

This conversation is closed.

Why is it so hard for one to open up about an abusive past?

How to you summon the courage to share? What are the reasons that one may keep such terrible things locked inside? How does one overcome this fear of sharing?


Showing single comment thread. View the full conversation.

  • May 2 2013: I somewhat learned about this in my psychology class a few years ago, as well as my personal experiences. Psychologically a person is capable of "forgetting" about a horrific experience (abusive past). When someone goes through something they can mentally delete it out of their minds, allowing them to move on. The down fall to this method is that you never grow from the experience and you haven't accepted the fact it happened.

    The second method is people "acting out". I saw an episode of criminal minds where the man was physically abused by his coach. 25 years later he found out his son was abused by his swim coach; He then began to murder people he felt was a threat to children, doing society justice. Me personally, I take bad experiences and flip them into a positive trait for growth and maturity. Nobody ever wants to revisit their past!
    • May 29 2013: In reply to the first paragraph. To generalize and say it's a down fall of the method, is quite simply put a vastly oversimplified generalization, that obviously comes from someone who is teaching a class, and has no practical experience in that matter what so ever.

      Now that may sound harsh, but it deserves to be, because generalizations like that - do more harm than good.

Showing single comment thread. View the full conversation.