TED Conversations

angela anima-korang

Graduate Research Assistant, Southern Illinois University Carbondale

This conversation is closed.

How do we deal with the culture of criticism, especially at schools, work, and in our private lives?

When do we learn that in most cases, what others think of us is just a reflection on their character and not on us? When do we accept that we are who we are and that our self-esteem is based on how we see ourselves, and should not be on how others see us?

Share:

Showing single comment thread. View the full conversation.

  • thumb
    Mar 27 2013: We are members of a community; as much as we have to be in harmony with ourselves as individuals, we also have to be in harmony with our community to a certain degree. So it is important to be sensitive to the feelings of others and to be able to differentiate between constructive criticism and unfair criticism.
    Pride can blind one to one's fault, it can blind us to the needs and expectations of others, and to ethical pitfalls that lies on one's path. Imagine if despots and dictators believe (I think they do) that the criticism of their acts is a reflection of the critics' perception. And imagine if those depraved lot have good self esteem.

    Personal and societal checks and balances are important in order for us to get a true picture of ourselves.
    • thumb
      Mar 28 2013: wow, thanks, Feyisayo. You make a very interesting point. Of course, I do hope that dictators know that what people say about them is actually the truth. That realization can do us all a lot of good.
      Per your name, I am thinking you are from Nigeria. (I am from Ghana). What do you think about the the common notion that the adult is always right? Does that help the youth? I believe it does (most times), only because they have a lot more experience than we young folks but I'm curious as to what you make of that.
      • thumb
        Mar 28 2013: Angela, I'm from Nigeria. Thanks for the interesting conversation. I dont think adults are always right, but they do have a lot to teach the younger folks based on their wealth of experience.
        An adult that would be a successful teacher and mentor is a kind that would be open to fresh ideas and would be humble enough to know when to listen and learn.
        • thumb
          Mar 28 2013: Exactly! I do not think that wisdom comes with age naturally. It depends on the person, although generally, experiences give us more of a better outlook on life. Hence, adults will have more to say on more topics. Thanks, Feyi!
        • thumb
          Mar 28 2013: Where I live there is not a message or expectation that adults are always right. In fact, my generation, the parents, typically, of twenty-somethings, came of age when the mantra among young people was that one couldn't trust people over thirty.

          So at this point blind respect for authority is not so common.

Showing single comment thread. View the full conversation.