TED Conversations

Steven Lopez

This conversation is closed. Start a new conversation
or join one »

Do people have to struggle to be normal?

I feel in life there is always a constant struggle. Looking for work, saving money, feeding yourself and children if you have any, and finding a place to live. Many people struggle with these tasks everyday. To me, saving money is normal. Someone else may live pay check to pay check so saving money is not a normal act to them. We all have to work to live but to be normal, I feel people struggle with it.

+2
Share:
progress indicator

  • Alex Velazquez

    • 0
    Mar 6 2013: what is normal anyway? and struggle for me is a sign that you are learning something new. if you struggle by doing the same things and without learning, i thing you are just overwhelmed by boredom and/or living life without a purpose.

  • Paul Proffitt

    • 0
    Mar 4 2013: Yes (inserting psychobabble now) because we all subscribe at some level to norms, laws, and mores in society so we can function to get the things we want out of it. We learn how to be normal and learning requires effort.

  • Random Chance 30+

    • 0
    Mar 3 2013: It is now 2013.
    If you're not a little bit crazy,
    then you're out of your f _ _ _ing mind!
    I need a little craziness. At least that's what society calls it.
    Let's me know I am sane.
    Society isn't and that's why they can't see or recognize their own insanity.
    They think they're normal.
  • thumb

    Scott Armstrong 50+

    • 0
    Mar 3 2013: the mortal coil foils all of us at some time or other. life isn't easy, and I'm not sure it would be much better if it were.

    everyone has problems/struggles it's just that, as you said, they take different forms.

    I like what Neil Young sang - "though my problems are meaningless/that don't make them go away".

    it helps me keep my own problems in perspective but reminds me that they still need dealing with.

  • Cynthia Chen 100+

    • +1
    TED Attendee
    Mar 3 2013: Trying letting go of any defined "normal", and there is no more normal or abnormal. IT is what it is....

  • greg dahlen 30+

    • 0
    Mar 2 2013: i think most don't have to struggle to be normal, that's what makes it normal. Remember, there is a wide range of what is "normal."
  • thumb

    Colleen Steen 500+

    • 0
    Mar 2 2013: Dear Steven,
    23 years ago, when I regained consciousness after a horseback riding accident, emergency craniotomy and being kept alive on life support systems for two weeks, my family and I were told I would never be "normal" again. I said thank you! Well, I was not "normal" as you describe it going into the event, so why would it be reasonable to think I'd come out the other side being "normal"??? LOL:>)

    Struggle: "to make violent strenuous efforts against opposition"
    The activities you mention are every day tasks, and part of the life experience. They are not oppositions, so why struggle against them?

    Struggle is a choice, which makes the everyday tasks seem more difficult. The thought or feeling of struggle also comes from a place of fear in our "self". Change the thought, we change the feeling, and we may change the life experience. If one thinks everything is a struggle, that is exactly the reality s/he creates for him/herself.

    Thankfully, by the time of the brain injury, I had learned NOT to struggle with life experiences, so I proceeded to learn, grow and evolve....much more interesting:>)

    • Barry Palmer 50+

      • 0
      Mar 3 2013: "Struggle is a choice, which makes the everyday tasks seem more difficult."

      I agree, Colleen, that struggle is a choice. I choose it because I enjoy the challenge.
      • thumb

        Colleen Steen 500+

        • 0
        Mar 3 2013: I enjoy a challenge Barry. I do not enjoy struggle. We can do the very same tasks with, or without the feeling of struggle, and I prefer to live the life adventure without struggle:>)
  • thumb

    Gail . 50+

    • 0
    Mar 2 2013: Having spent 30 years being "normal" and another 30 years being abnormal, I'll stick with the abnormal. How much more wonderful life is!

  • george lockwood 30+

    • 0
    Mar 2 2013: Some people or most people. I'm not exactly sure what you mean. At certain ages it can be very important to confirm, and for some people it may always be important.
  • thumb

    pat gilbert 100+

    • 0
    Mar 2 2013: Comparing yourself to anyone else is folly. Instead compare yourself now to yourself before, are you moving toward your goals?

  • Barry Palmer 50+

    • +2
    Mar 2 2013: To me, struggling is normal, but the goal of the struggle is to be my best self, whether that is normal or not.
  • thumb

    Fritzie Reisner 100+

    • 0
    Host
    Mar 2 2013: Many of us don't think for a moment about trying to be normal. We are who we are and don't look at others, or averages, as goals or reference points.
Showing all 14 comments