TED Conversations

Carl Men

Environmental Student,

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Porn's effects on women users

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=wSF82AwSDiU

I was directed here from the above listed TEDX talk. The Great Porn Experiment, which is in fact a response to this TED talk.

There's a lot of talk about how internet porn affect men, who are the majority users, I'm curious if there are any studies (and hopefully talks) about effect on women users. I know how porn have effects on porn actresses, but I'm asking about effect on how porn affect women who watches porn.

Or perhaps there's no effect, or social effect for that matter, since the number is too insignificant to have a study done to it. But women do represent half of humanity, and I'm sure such a study would present some interesting insights to how porn affect human, and not just men.

What do you think/know about this topic?

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    Dec 2 2012: Ken - broadly speaking, yes, but the issue is more nuanced than that. MakeLoveNotPorn is not anti-porn. The issue isn't porn, but the lack in our society of a counterpoint - an open, healthy discussion around sex in the real world, that would then, amongst many other benefits, enable people to bring a real-world mindset to the viewing of what is essentially artificial entertainment. Our tagliine is 'Pro-sex. Pro-porn. Pro-knowing the difference.' Our entire message boils down to 'Talk about it'. That's because overly porn-influenced behavior is usually driven by the best motives, not the worst. We all get vulnerable when we get naked. Sexual egos are very fragile. People find it bizarrely difficult to talk about sex with the people they're actually having it with, while they're actually having it. You are terrified of hurting the other person's feelings/putting them off you/derailing the encounter/derailing the entire relationship - but you want to please them; you'll seize your cues on how to from anywhere you can, and if the only cues you've ever been given or encountered are from porn, those are the ones you'll take - to not very good effect. This is an issue that would never have crossed my mind if I had not begun encountering it very directly and personally, through dating men in their twenties, 5 years ago, and why I launched http://makelovenotporn.com/ 4 years ago, before the media talked about any of this. I am my own research lab - I continue to date younger men - and so I can tell you this issue is endemic and it's only getting worse. (And I am very selective about whom I date and only date utterly lovely younger men - but this is how they are being educated about sex.)

    Also, yes, this is manifesting negatively re male self-image, as per this piece from the New York Times recently:

    http://www.nytimes.com/2012/11/19/health/teenage-boys-worried-about-body-image-take-risks.html

    It doesn't mention porn, but I can tell you that's one of the reasons for this.

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