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Porn's effects on women users
http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=wSF82AwSDiU
I was directed here from the above listed TEDX talk. The Great Porn Experiment, which is in fact a response to this TED talk.
There's a lot of talk about how internet porn affect men, who are the majority users, I'm curious if there are any studies (and hopefully talks) about effect on women users. I know how porn have effects on porn actresses, but I'm asking about effect on how porn affect women who watches porn.
Or perhaps there's no effect, or social effect for that matter, since the number is too insignificant to have a study done to it. But women do represent half of humanity, and I'm sure such a study would present some interesting insights to how porn affect human, and not just men.
What do you think/know about this topic?
Cindy Gallop 200+
Cindy Gallop 200+
http://bullettmedia.com/article/porn-thats-not-porn-cindy-gallops-case-for-real-world-sex/
Do email cindy@makelovenotporn.com and I'll send you an invite into beta.
Linda Taylor 50+
I am so far past that I will not settle for that anymore. That stuff is for rank amateurs. I do not want to watch other people in love having sex. I want to be the performer. It's simply a better role.
If you think this generation has it bad with porn available everywhere with the click of the tv controller, Imagine when I was coming into my sexuality. There was not much and it was really bad. There was 'Deep Throat and Debbie does Dallas. The music was boom waka waka. I mean really yucky. But we figured it out or not, just as this generation will figure it out or not.
I do think it is a good idea for people with questions to have an experienced impartial source for advice. We had Ann Landers and then Dr. Ruth. Always remember it is just advice.
Krisztián Pintér 200+
the sex we have in our everyday life is the hottest sex there is. therefore you can upload videos for others to see.
question that involves logic: if you want to convince us that our own sex experience is the best, why would i watch your content instead? and if i do watch some content instead of having sex myself, why would it be your content instead of the zillion out there? jeez, i'm still in an infinite loop, not finding the exit.
Krisztián Pintér 200+
Cindy Gallop 200+
Krisztian, here is why I'm doing what I'm doing:
http://www.nytimes.com/2012/05/10/garden/when-children-see-internet-pornography.html?_r=2&pagewanted=all
Take a look at the 'About' page on http://makelovenotporn.com/ to see just some of the thousands of emails I've received from people everywhere that demonstrate why this is an issue.
Re how what we're doing is different, don't take it from me, take it from a review from the porn industry itself, here where WhackMagazine calls us 'nothing short of revolutionary':
http://whackmagazine.com/post/36514826944/from-the-whack-archives-review-of-makelovenotporn-tv
and a perspective from porn blogger LynseyG:
http://lynseyg.com/cindy-gallop-will-make-you-think-and-bring-you-hot-sex-videos-all-at-the-same-time/
Best thing is to take a look for yourself - email cindy@makelovenotporn.com and I'll send you a beta invite. :)
Cindy Gallop 200+
Also, yes, this is manifesting negatively re male self-image, as per this piece from the New York Times recently:
http://www.nytimes.com/2012/11/19/health/teenage-boys-worried-about-body-image-take-risks.html
It doesn't mention porn, but I can tell you that's one of the reasons for this.
Cindy Gallop 200+
Do come check us out :)
Cindy Gallop 200+
When I launched http://makelovenotporn.com/ at TED 2009:
http://blog.ted.com/2009/12/02/cindy_gallop_ma/
everything I said about porn acting as default sex ed in the absence of an open, healthy attitude to and dialogue around sex in the real world, applies just as much to women as to men. (Check out the 'About' page on the site for just some of the thousands of emails I've received daily over the past four years about MLNP from young and old, male and female, gay and straight, from every country in the world.) Young women write to me distressed about the fact that their boyfriends are doing everything they see in porn. But young men also write to me to say, my girlfriends are doing everything they see in porn; they're putting on a performance, and it's getting in the way of a real connection.
For detail on how porn influences women as well as men, please read my short TED book 'Make Love Not Porn: Technology's Hardcore Impact On Human Behavior': https://itunes.apple.com/us/book/make-love-not-porn/id452296228?mt=11
Those emails inspired me to launch https://makelovenotporn.tv/ just 3 months ago - this is the New York Times on that venture: http://www.nytimes.com/2012/09/09/fashion/cindy-gallops-online-effort-to-promote-real-not-porn-fed-sex.html?_r=0
The porn industry, like every other industry, is male-dominated. 99% of mainstream porn is made by men for men. There are women making porn, and 'feminist porn' , but too few of them. The best future is one equally influenced 50/50 by men and women. The shape, approach and content of the porn industry will change when there are many more of us women creating ventures within it; more women will enjoy them, and men too, because they will be innovative and different - like MLNPTV :)
Ken brown 30+
Is there an illusion out there in the average males mind that they are/should look like those buffed hairless sixpacked porn actors? as well as there should be only young and dumb perfect females who are constantly gagging for it? is this the attitude that is out there as opposed to what was there 20 years ago?
Linda Taylor 50+
Sex is not just a pleasurable behavior. Not if you know what you are doing. If a woman is going through guys like condoms (been there, done that), she might not understand how sex affects the spirit. How that spirit connects with another spirit when there is love and commitment. A woman is lucky if she gets the chance to experience that. Getting your rocks off is not the same as a blending of spirit,. I don't know how better to explain it.
In talking to some of my guy friends, they understand that too. They understand when there is love there is a connection of spirit and being with each other. I would imagine it does not matter about sexual orientation. That is why when there is a spiritual connection a break up can be devastating. You loose part of your spirit. It's not the same as mutually parting with a good lay.
That is why porn is so uninteresting and banal. That is also why sex can be boring and banal. I would rather go to biology class.
But I would clear my schedule for a man who understands this.
Linda Taylor 50+
Then there is also the problem that women are taught to compare themselves to other women. So when they see Miss September, they feel bad about themselves, which has the exact opposite effect on arousal. And they feel even worse if you are the one that says, "hey, look at Miss September." Now guys, think about what she is thinking about you when she sees Mr. September. Oh yeah, I can tell you you are not gonna get lucky because why can't you be just like him?
Women are aroused inside our minds. Not through our eyes. So that is why erotic books are so popular. Fifty shades of Grey for example. The visual is left to the reader and the reader has insight into the motivation and thoughts of the characters which is crucial for many women. It is the relationship (real or pretend) that is arousing, not intercourse.
When women think of romance, they think of flowers and touch and beautiful images. Men think of all that as the stuff they got to go through to get to the romance.
For women its about the relationship not about the sex. Porn is all about the sex without relationship. It is frankly biological and very much like sitting through biology at least for some of us. In reality intercourse is biology. Which is why some of us are thinking about the grocery list and the laundry etc, during intercourse if the guy does not pay attention to the romance and relationship.
Porn is just gross.
Krisztián Pintér 200+
Linda Taylor 50+
Romance and relationship are so intertwined in a woman's mind and it is that combination that is arousing. Not romance in and of itself or worse yet, someone else's romance.
What guys don't understand is how arousing romance and relationship is for a woman. If you did, you all would invest more effort into it. It is not linear so sometimes you have to invest more effort into it than other times. But guys could have fabulous intercourse if they know what they are doing with the relationship and a little romance (flowers, chocolate romance. Not genital romance).
Ever see an ugly guy with a beautiful and wonderful woman? He knows and understands this principle. And she usually thinks he is the most wonderful man on the planet.
That's why romantic movies are not arousing in and of themselves. It is like watching porn. You just can't get into the relationship by watching it. It's that whole part about the thoughts and motivation of the characters. Hollywood doesn't do a good job of that.
Krisztián Pintér 200+
pat gilbert 50+
Linda Taylor 50+
Mitch SMith 50+
I have obsered the equivalent of ED in porn-adicted females - it manifests as an inability to achieve orgasm. I am not going to generalise this becuase my sample data is not statistically significant.
I would also propose that TED itself is another vector of arousal based adiction.
We have some very serious self-review to undertake in light of these insights. I for one will take it seriously.
John Frum 30+
* Porn "users"? Do we people also "use" musicals or action thrillers?
* Women don't watch porn. Some of them enjoy erotica now and then. (What's the difference? The sex of the watcher.)
As for studies, the first result in http://scholar.google.co.uk/scholar?q=affect+female+pornography+OR+erotica is http://link.springer.com/article/10.1007%2FBF01542096?LI=true. Go through the list at Google for more studies.
Also try http://scholar.google.co.uk/scholar?q=addiction+female+pornography+OR+erotica
Carl Men
*But that's just it, if it affect men, then women's reaction shouldn't be all too different. But like I said, there's just not that many women who watch internet porn, or not on the level men does. So...
Gerald O'brian 50+
Let's face it ; porn sucks. Every porn movie I've watched was awfully crappy. And yet again, women seem to care about quality.
Morton Bast 200+
On the other hand, I think the secondhand effect is enormous. If straight male sexuality is being affected, you can bet that straight female sexuality is, too. (Also see Cindy Gallop's talk: http://blog.ted.com/2009/12/02/cindy_gallop_ma/)
Carl Men
I am nevertheless still interested in such a study if it exist.
Great link by the way.
Cindy Gallop 200+
Austin Rinehart
Teenagers in the peak of sexual maturation have the strongest reaction.
Ken brown 30+
Lejan . 30+
Carl Men
george lockwood 20+
One might say men and women do not do things exactly the same way.
george lockwood 20+
Carl Men
Krisztián Pintér 200+
Carl Men
Fritzie Reisner 100+