- Jake Frackson
- Victoria, Bc
- Canada
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Shame is a hinderance to education.
In Brené Brown's "Listening to Shame," she describes the difference between guilt and shame: guilt is "I made a mistake" and shame is "I am a mistake." By accepting these definitions, can it not be assumed that shame is not needed in schools? If shame is a personal opinion of oneself, is it not then only a hinderance to gaining an education?
In an article that I wrote recently(jakefrackson.wordpress.com - You Should be Ashamed of Yourself), I discuss shame and its role in education systems. I explore the use of shame and why, I believe, it is not necessary.
Working with the definition of shame above, is shame a hinderance to education?
Topics:
education philosophy shame
George QT
In my opinion a very effective and efficient way to improve education would be to teach students from kinder garden to college to handle their emotions in a proper manner.
Jason Huffman
In that token, we thrive because of a fear of failure. Thus, "shame" is the most basic catalytic agent responsible for success. Taken to the context of education students will immerse themselves in study in order to reside above the status quo. Therefore, shame is the emotion responsible for competition and competition is the great inventor of progress. Without shame we lose our primal fear of losing. It seems only natural that it would exist as a natural emotion to drive us to be better at whatever field we attempt in life.
However, when an individual dwells on shortcomings instead of simply redressing them or doing something different that they are more inherently versed as persons to accomplish we see self-loathing which is a detriment botht o the person and the progress that person might derive within their brief time in existence. Shame should be embraced for its sheer horror and then displaced by either redress or understanding that not everyone will be good at everything. So it goes...
flexman feng
carolyn mcauley 10+
Kate Blake 50+
If we make a mistake, apologise and move on, try not to do it again.
Shame is more related to self-worth and therefore quite an unhealthy concept. I think it's a hindrance to self-worth and life, therefore eduction also. I can't think of one thing it would be worthy to be ashamed of; maybe war? But then shame would just freeze any action, if we don't agree with war then we should do whatever is possible to stop it, or help others understand that violence does not resolve anything!
Mark Hurych
Nice article, Jake.
I agree with you in that shame is not a useful tool in education nor does it have any rightful place. I think it is more of a symptom of a larger problem than a problem in and of itself. The design of the educational system has to be rebuilt on a new foundation in order to encourage what you rightfully see as beneficial free-thinking creativity and vibrance.
...
Santokh Saggu
Mark Hurych
Santokh Saggu
greg dahlen 20+
What are the implications of your division for the death penalty, in other words, when we put someone to death we are saying that person didn't just make a mistake, they are a mistake.
Mark Hurych
We can't claim the other person is a mistake and when we say so of ourselves it is actually not helpful. I am a mistake in the sense that two college students in the 50s had sex without intending to cause me. They did. But they bore the lion's share of shame by getting married, having two more "cover up" kids, and never telling me the truth about my origins. Even though I was shielded from shame this way I know that everyone that has at least a little shame swamp tumor lurking about in their personal baggage.
BTW I'm not a believer, but the principles you speak of seem sound.
Patience Gardener
Shame is not the normal response of a "good conscience" because shame is the result of someone else telling you how to act, not from knowing yourself what is right.
Shame isn't motivating, it's degrading.
Why would you want to improve for a teacher, a coach, or anyone else who makes you feel so bad even if shame didn't leave you feeling like you are incapable of becoming better?
Ben Jarvis 50+
the single case where i'd agree with you is that kids should never be ashamed to have a guess. making an attempt even when unsure if you're right or not is important.
this is the very reason why education in america has declined so much in recent years. instead of helping students improve and achieve, teachers are forced to push the tolerance of mediocrity. we should always strive to be the best we can be, and be ashamed when we've done ourselves a disservice by not trying to live up to our potential.
Jennie Trias
However efficient such a system may appear, schools do not produce merchandise; they foster creativity and educate America’s youth so that they can construct promising futures. Current educators recognize the pessimistic metaphor and refer to a large percentage of our nation’s schools as “drop out factories” (Balfan Waiting for Superman http://www.waitingforsuperman.com/action/).
Once the system sorts and labels students, they lose any desire to learn. They have been conditioned to recognize only their limitations. The negative conditioning does produce shame, but worse than that, it produces apathy. Additionally, it reduces learning to the lowest common denominator.
Mats Kaarbö 10+
Check out this video for more information about the Finland education system: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qlOfZL_J5fo
Nancy Nunn
Patience Gardener
Kenya Perry
Danger Lampost 10+
The danger is that shame is a social and subjective phenomenon, and this brings in to play individual vs. social morals. If you feel shamed by others, it's quite possible that YOU are right and the OTHERS are wrong. Or not.
It seems we all have personal blind spots - areas of our own personality that we are blind to. And we rely on our friends to help us see ourselves, when we can not see ourselves. When we've done something and feel shame, we must judge whether the shame is legitimate. It may well be, or it may not. But I think it's worth looking into. If it is, it's worth considering whether a personal change is needed.
Kenya Perry
edward long 100+
Jake Frackson
Juliette Zahn 50+
Robert Winner 50+
There appears to be a mix of replies regarding shame and what I term as regret. Regreting that I did not catch the winning TD is not the same as the shame of not doing it.
I do not see shame as a hinderance to education usless the teacher is the one who is assigning the shame publiclly.
Shame would imply total failure and if a teacher is heeping that burden on a student they need to be reported. Education is about being given the opportunity to learn, grow, and succeed and all efforts should be to arrive at those goals. Some will assimulate faster than others and that is natural. Some will require a little more guidance from the teacher to reach the goal.
If the "shame" is of a non-educational source it is still the job of the teacher to not judge but to ensure that the student is in a caring and nuturing environment that is concerned with their mind and given the same opportunities to excell as all other students. If the student continues to show problems that are interfering with the class or the learning environment then the student should be refered to the proper authority that is charged with counselling or mental health of the student.
Remember that no one can make you feel bad about yourself without your permission.
All the best. Bob.
Fritzie Reisner 100+
I agree fully with your statement: "if a teacher is heeping that burden on a student they need to be reported. Education is about being given the opportunity to learn, grow, and succeed and all efforts should be to arrive at those goals. Some will assimulate faster than others and that is natural. Some will require a little more guidance from the teacher to reach the goal."
Students learn best when they can see evidence of their own growth and successes. It is the teacher's job to make sure this happens.
Jake Frackson
Fritzie Reisner 100+
When I taught in lower education, teachers had signs up that said "Mistakes are falling FORWARD."
Unfortunately some teachers substitute other frameworks for motivating students.
moni sri
Juniper Blue 10+
I feel that shame is generally unproductive in the classroom. I heard the message "You are not trying hard enough" repeatedly. I felt deeply ashamed that my earnest efforts where never enough and I internalized the feeling as "I am never enough." I was a perfectionist and this added to the toxicity of my experience. When I finally graduated form high school and proceeded to enroll in a community college, I was able to get evaluated for learning disabilities and it was discovered that my functioning levels were very asymmetrical. While my language skills placed me in a clearly gifted category my spacial skills were abysmally low ... The mystery was solved but the damage had been done. I had survived multiple head injuries due to childhood abuse in my home and I wonder if the teachers had asked more questions about the underlying reasons as to why I was not performing well (in the area of mathematics, in particular) instead of assuming that I was simply "not trying hard enough", if some of my suffering and brain trauma could have been avoided. What is clear, is that the shame that I felt for failing to meet their expectations only compounded my problems.
carolyn mcauley 10+
Ed Schulte 50+
base your argument on the statement " shame is a personal opinion of oneself" because it will do nothing but make oneself more open / more vulnerable to attack from negative elementals be they your own (iow internal ) or others (iow external)
You would do well to understand what Eckhart Tolle points to when he speaks about "Pain Body" because he shows how to dis-identify with Pain Body/Negative Elementals instead of ....as brown does ...strengthening them.
Shame ...better said Negative Elements are a "hinderance" everywhere but lets not miss the fact that ...when one finally allows oneself to Love oneself (and the all others) it clearly demonstrates the Dualist nature of the Ego ....and is therefore a great teacher!! and confirms why we HUmans are experiencing this existence in a "material" world.
Austin Rinehart
That's when the concept "complete failure" is presented.
But what a student can do with such a daily mood? Reside in a depression?
Random Chance 30+
The shame that one is not perfect. Nothing wrong with this and it can be a guidepost when one becomes so prideful or arrogant that they need some kind of come-uppance in order to learn that balance.
But, the shame whereby an individual feels they're being alive is a mistake of some kind, or they feel they are wrong, bad, not good enough and so on, (such as Original Sin), simply by birth or their upbringing, is known as toxic shame and that shame is very bad and not needed.
I think the differences need to be known and understood.
Certainly there has been way too much intentional toxic-shaming of humans, using gender, sexual orientations, beliefs, social status, religion, race and others, that are so extremely narrow-minded, and done so over centuries, that in their almost absolute blindness, look at the results in the world, over time.
Gail . 50+
Patience Gardener
Venus Lim
Ed Schulte 50+
Indeed
Patience Gardener
Where else does shame come from if not from mistakes or any effort someone else has deemed unacceptable? It's sourced in other people's reactions to you not your conscience.
I do agree that you can use shame as a learning opportunity- to learn not to be ashamed of yourself.
Kayla Swing
I think that the shame of not excelling in school is given in the hopes that it will make someone try harder and strive to do better. But I don’t think that it isn’t often taken in by the student like that. It is considered instead as something more personal, because a judgement of something you have done is like a judgement of you.
Feyisayo Anjorin 50+
If someone really desires to be educated there is a wealth of resources in books, libraries and online that could be helpful in launching one on the path of education.
As for shame; there is no reason for an individual to be stuck in a rut because of some past mistake/circumstance, or because of the words and attitude of someone else.
Walt Headstrong
Fritzie Reisner 100+