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Agnius Balabonas

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Debate: Can non-standard monogamous relationships work?

I've been wondering if these different kind of relationships could work, how they would work: what would be the guidelines and things to watch out for.

I'm interested in an open, well-argued and as little biased as possible constructive discussions to come out of this.
I encourage people to share the scientific material, historical data and their own experience of the area. And I strongly discourage wars based solely on opinions and cultural bias.

So far I believe, that these types of relationships can only work based on honesty, openness, trust and clearly agreed upon guidelines, so that the parties involved know what to expect and won't get hurt based on failed expectations.

There is still very little quantitative research in the area available, so I hope we will be able enrich each others views and open up the mind to a broader perspective.

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Closing Statement from Agnius Balabonas

I thank people who gave a little more insight, views for their experience and opening up some controversial topics to conversation.

I was a little bit sad however.. That's a lot of the people misunderstood what was the conversation about and the conversation lacked focus.
I think in future I should formulate the topic in a more clear way making it harder to misinterpret.

This conversation was meant to be about any kind relationships involving more than two parties. It was not about an exclusive relationship between two people, it was not just about sex and it was not about "cheating".
Hope that helps clarify a lot of the misunderstandings I saw in the discussion.

Nevertheless, I want to thank to all the people that participated and shared their insights.

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    Oct 23 2012: Monogamous relationships...in my opinion, takes a lot of time, patience and genuine understanding of each other. Also, you've got to also do a lot of listening with one another. Listening is a BIG PART for any long term or serious relationship, because i believe listening to one another creates sharing information with one another...that way both participants are aware of what one they are saying, and not just one person making all the rules and whatever, cause that would just seem selfish if it is just one person calling all the shots. it requires teamwork and "the wanting of being together", being attracted to one another, not just physically, but all the other aspects, mentally, and whole heartedly... and being open about things that frustrate you...talk about your problems. be comforting ...a lot of people find it difficult to be open with there problems cause they see it as a sign of weekness, but really...i believe in a monogamous or any relationship with someone being open with your problems creates this comfort in which you can help the person by being there for them, because sometimes the world is a crazy place, and just a shoulder and someone to talk to, can mean so much at that moment, that is creates a stronger bond, a sense of faithfulness and security...which is a big thing also i think in these kinds of relationships. and lastly, YOU MAKE IT WORK. if you want to be in a monogamous relationship then so be it. you can make it happen, anyone can, its just that statistically nowadays with the high devorce rates in America, i guess a lot of them choose not to. but thats them. its really all up to you how you want to live your life. : ) People perceive love in many ways.

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