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How do we draw the line between embracing vulnerability and being careless?
Vulnerability could bring us pain and could be a source of great gain.
Rape statistics in South Africa reveals that most victims (mostly women) are raped by people that they know. Victims hardly expose the offenders; because they blame themselves for their woes, and because society hardly takes women seriously when they accuse men that have been seen with them at one time or the other.
After my college and varsity days in Johannesburg I visited my hometown (Akure, Nigeria) and initiated an event that is meant to educate youths and teenagers on issues of sexual health.
It is believed that if a girl visits a guy who is her friend or lover, she should expect sex (in fact, it is assumed that a girl visiting a guy is expecting sex at some point)
I had a hard time convincing some of the youths that when one person forces another to have sex with him or her, it is rape. And that familiarity or relationship does not change that fact.
Eventually, I worked with the team and directed a PSA “Rape”. Please watch in the link below
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SVZ-MtYCiHw&feature=plcp
I agree with Brene Brown; relationships are about trust and vulnerability, and life will be miserable if we are always suspicious, and permanently on guard against possible betrayal.
We can’t help but be vulnerable to family and friends and lovers. And we can’t help but trust some people if we hope to be happy.
But there is also great danger in vulnerability. Sometimes, evil comes in packages that convincingly seem good; and friends and family may hurt us in a way other people cant.
How do we draw the line between embracing vulnerability and being careless?
chen xin
about relationship i want to say that you should always be you .
noting can change .we may find some widom ways to settle the problem .btu we should change
and another point you should alwaus believe in your family .they wont hurt you .maybe they dont have the proper ways to express their ideas but they are always good to you
about friendship we all need some friends in our life not much one or two is enough .they should really know about you
Shanmugananda M
Carelessness - Same two grownup pets - feeding time - :) Try hand feeding the dog. Even if you dodge a morsel, the friendly dog will wait till you drop the food to catch it. Try the same trick with a lion :), if you are lucky you could walk away with atleast one hand intact! :)
Eva Karin Andersson
As I see this talk, it has nothing to do with being careless or letting people do whatever they want to you. Maybe it's even the other way around? Maybe if you admit you are vulnerable it gets easier to stand up for yourself than if you walk around pretending you can handle anything or that nothing really matters? My answer to your question would be that showing vulnerability or not is not an issue in this case since it's a structural problem. Still, showing vulnerability can probably be helpful in other small or big personal ways to most people. That's what I believe.
Steve C
Keep looking into her work.
If we have integrity, we will be able to appropriately defend ourselves.
Ehis Odijie 10+
There is no acceptable line - it depends on the circumstances, time and place, persons involved etcetera. We can only speak of it in terms of principle, application has to be on individual basis.
But let me play the devils advocate here and turn to your point on Akure, Nigeria. If it is generally believed that if a girl visits her lover, she should expect sex. And this is believed by the girls and the guys in that community, then any girl who visits her lover, within this system, want sex or should expect it.
Feyisayo Anjorin 50+
Ehis Odijie 10+
Fritzie Reisner 100+
I think vulnerability must be qualified with caution in situations that are actually dangerous and irreversible. Sometimes the confidence we place in people will be misplaced. As you say, there can be wolves in sheep's clothing.