This conversation is closed. Start a new conversation
or join one »
Advance Care Planning--having 'healthy' conversations to empower you!
What are your thoughts and stories regarding difficult conversations. Advance care planning is where people discuss with their family members/friends their values, goals and wishes regarding end-of-life care. It's ongoing and, over time, evolving conversations.
It's harder to not talk about this part of our lives-- we spend 9months preparing for children, can we suggest making time to prepare for our end, stating what we want? Giving this gift to family or friends sharing whatever burdens we're willing or not willing to experience regarding life-sustaining treatments like CPR, intubation, antibiotics, artificial nutrition or dialysis.
Share them with me.
Lars Mews
My parents a bit like that too and seem to enjoy taking care of their "last days". They already "ordered" places where they want to be buried after death, and what actions are allowed/not allowed if they need prolonging care treatments.
I believe that is a matter of age. When you know the end is coming, you probably dont want all medical treatment that is possible to prolonge your life, simply because the chance of a real cure is not likely to happen. While young people would rather take all possible treatments, because if a cure is found, there is many years left they can spend living.
So, i would say if people are fantasizing about their death, they should do this alone for themselve. I really have no wish for ongoing conversations about this. And young people want to learn about life, thats what they have in mind.
I at least don't see it as a gift that my parents already managed their death. I will have to deal with the loss anyways, the "cosmetics" like funeral and medical care, they have to be done anyways when this time comes. Its ok that they done that, but for me there does not change much by that.
People might consider that it could ease their relatives when they write down at what time machines shall be turned off and such. But it does not, because instead of the thought "did we torture them because we waited so long", there will be the thought "if we just had waited this or that time, the medical treatment would have made it possible, maybe there would have been a recovery...".
People have no voice in questions about being born, and i think they fool themselve if they think they have a voice when it comes to their own death. It is no fun to die, it will not become fun.