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John Moonstroller

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We are all mortal. We all grow old. What do you think about that?

If you are old you probable have a lot to say about living and can summarize many things you've learned in life.

If you're young, you probably have many questions you'd like to ask someone about what it's like to grow old.

If you could only ask one question, or give only one piece of advice, what would it be?

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Closing Statement from John Moonstroller

Once I was strong and boastful. The oceans were a pond to leap over; mountains were a hill I had to cross to get to where I was going. I've flown like a bird, swam like a fish and danced with death many times. Now I'm weak and frail and await my end. "It's not fair", I thought to learn so much, to understand so many things and loose it all in the end.
Where is the justice in that? There has to be something I missed.

This is a video that Juliette Zahn posted on my TED question. The person in this video, Nick Vajikic sums up how we should all feel about life.
He says,
"It's a lie to think that your not good enough.",
"It's a lie to think that your not worth anything".

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gc4HGQHgeFE

After watching this video The feelings of weakness left. Now I feel I have much to do and "...miles to go before I sleep."

Considering how inhuman some people can be, growing old is the only way to insure that tyranny, injustice, and evil does not, forever, inhabit this world. We should embrace growing old and give it the respect it deserves. Growing old and dying is a process that insures that life itself will never end.

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    . . 100+

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    Sep 2 2012: ..
    With life as short as a half taken breath,
    Don't plant anything but Love.
    Rumi ♥
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    Sep 3 2012: All religious and philosophical aspects aside, one thing I feel everyone can identify with, is a point in time where it is just you and your thoughts before you die. In those last moments you don't want torments of things you didn't learn, people you didn't help, words you didn't say. Live to your best estimation that you will have none of these torments.
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      Sep 3 2012: This is excellent advice Justin.

      I volunteered in a terminal care facility for a couple years, and sat with many people who were actively dying (a term used to describe the process when the organs start to shut down in a predictable way).

      Those who felt peaceful in their life, seemed to be peaceful with the dying process as well. Those who felt like they had unfinished business, or regret, were not as peaceful or content with dying.



      John,
      I tried 3 times to answer your question in the box above and the system would not accept the comment....it looked like it posted, then it disappeared, so I'll attempt to put it here.

      I think that the aging and dying process is very natural, so I will accept it when the time comes.
      Having already faced death, I learned that the experience has brought me closer to life. The one piece of advice I continually offer, is to be fully present and engaged in the life experience...BE HERE NOW.
  • Sep 3 2012: Do not waste the time you have worrying about what others think of you.

    Do, achieve, and accomplish all you can.

    Cherish relationships and time spent with the ones you love.
  • Sep 2 2012: Nothing lasts forever here on earth. We are only here for a while. The time to do the right thing and to get our priorities right, is NOW.

    Because as much as we hate to hear it, we dont know when and how it will end.
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    Sep 2 2012: I am 61, with a bit of pain from two motorcycle crashes. I am paired at work with a 31yr old lady with a lot of joint pain, from her former gymnastics career. We are both Christians & enjoy each day as it comes, & looking forward to eternal, pain free, life.
    Age is relative, some have harder lives than others, that's just a fact. My advice would be to make people your priority, ahead of material stuff. New car, new house, new boat; ok for a short while. Friendships can last a lifetime; or forever, if we live that long.

    :-)
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      Sep 2 2012: I couldn't agree with you more Peter Law. The friendships you forge today will help you in the autumn and winter parts of your life like no other one thing you could do.

      That is wonderful advice to younger people wondering how to fashion their lives. I imagine, you, like me, have been to a few funerals where not many people showed up. That is a sad experience.

      Developing friendship networks is a basic requirement for growing old successfully.
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    Sep 3 2012: John, Growing old sure beats the alternative for me anyway. I try to stay active, eat right, exercise sensably, and learn something new everyday.

    I will be 70 this month and coach football, basketball, and track, on the school board, volunteer at the local orphanage, write for the local paper, a man tracker for the sheriff posse, member of the civilian emergency response team (CERT), and am generally lazy the rest of the time.

    Hell no I will not go quitely into that night ...... LOL

    All the best. Bob.
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    Sep 2 2012: Your life will not be measured by how much you make or what you have. It's the legacy you leave behind that is important.
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    Sep 2 2012: I'm 60 years old and I've suffered with chronic pain since I was 19 years old after I was hit by a mortar round in a battle in Vietnam. I feel much older. War is not healthy for any living thing and I would ask that all young people try to find another way to solve problems that lead to war. Save your money. Trust your instincts.
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      Sep 3 2012: Thank you for your service to America. What a concept, sir, a world without war!
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      Sep 3 2012: John, Edward, and Robert...my list is growing...my husband and many friends were there as well.
      Thanks to all of you for your service to our country. Yes indeed, a world without war is a wonderful concept. Do you think we can ever create that?
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        Sep 3 2012: Who knows? The world if full of heroes. Perhaps one will arise one day and force us to make the choice.

        It will have to be a world wide choice, probably all at once, while faced with an alternative that no one in their right mind could accept.
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        Sep 3 2012: Colleen, I think we may be able to eliminate traditional war, but we probably won't be able to eliminate "conflict". That sounds like just a case of semantics, but look at the way war has changed, and the problem it causes governments and nation-states...countries with actual geo-political borders you can define on a map.

        WW2 allowed nation-states to "declare" war against a geo-political entity. We knew where the enemy was, thus where to "attack" them. We could declare war against Germany and Japan. We would have to fight that war in other nation-states too, but the end goal was to physically "get to" the nation-state we declared war against.

        Compare that to the "wars" fought today. Take Terrorism for instance. Terrorism does not have a government or leadership that has a geo-political boundary. Al Quida is not a nation-state. Terrorism is "based from" and "conducted from" a vast number of geo-political locations. In that regard, the U.S. can't even LEGALLY declare a "war" against it under our Constitution, any more than we can declare a legal war against Drugs, Poverty, Crime, and all the other things that get labeled as "war". But the "conflict" is real.

        Can the U.S. declare "war" on Afghanistan to fight against terrorists operating from there? ONLY if we can prove that it is government sponsored terrorism by the Afghan government. So we can use diplomacy to ask the government to stop the terrorism from originating within their border. One of 3 things will happen:

        1. They will say "OK" and stop it.

        2. They will say "No" and not stop it.

        3. But there is a third thing that happens, too. They may say, "We would like to stop it, but we can't". And if they say that publiclly, they may be subject to retaliation from the terrorists themselves. Look around...it has happened often.

        So, we go in and stop it ourselves, without declaring "war" on the nation-state. But it is/was still a "conflict" that needed resolution.
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          Sep 3 2012: Thank you Rick for your service to our country too. I know these things of which you speak. One of my personas is "Pollyanna", and I will never stop dreaming of, and putting my energy toward peace in our world:>)
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          Sep 3 2012: I think the Israelis sum it up in this saying:

          "If the Arabs lay down their weapons, there will be peace in the middle east.
          If the Israelis lay down their weapons, there will be no more Israel."

          So here we are.
          As we grow old, we reflect on what we have accomplished in our lifetimes.
          I guess the great failure of every older generation is that they failed to erase violent conflict from society so their children and grandchildren can live in a world of peace.

          I lost one Uncle in WWII and two Uncles to the after affects of WWII (They died of alcoholism). I remember my Aunt telling me that my Uncle didn't like to talk any more always looked at them with a strange look in his eyes. He went to work, came home and immediately started drinking.

          As a youngster I remember that look in his eyes. When I came home from Vietnam, I looked into his eyes and could finally see what it was he was seeing when he looked at other people. It was kinda like a 1000 yard stare. When our eyes locked. I saw tears in his eyes and we embraced and cried for a few min. Not a word passed between us. I finally understood the mind of my Uncle. I understood his pain.
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        Sep 3 2012: That link reminds me of this event that took place in WWI in 1914.

        http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Christmas_truce
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          Sep 3 2012: Good link, John.

          In reply to your post above it, I agree it may be a great failure of your and my (older) generation that we have failed to TOTALLY eliminate violent conflict for the sake of our children. But I have to also think we have successfully eliminated SOME of the violent conflict that we faced, and our children have received a great benefit from that.

          You also made another great point. Even the "victors" in any conflict do not walk away unharmed. As you described by using your relatives who have been engaged in conflict to try to eliminate it (which seems hypocritical in and of itself at face value), even the "victors" are forever changed. Everybody pays a price when conflict is used to resolve something.

          I hope for a conflict-free world sometime in our future. I'm an optimist, but there are some things even the best optimism may never be able to overcome. I just can't see a world in which every human being will be able to agree on everything. By definition, that will result in conflict.

          To me, it's not the need to eliminate the disagreement...something that probably will never happen. It is the need to learn to tolerate it without feeling the need to act out on it violently. Until that happens, physical conflict is going to be something we all have to deal with.
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          Sep 4 2012: I've seen that link John, and it's always a good reminder that people CAN stop fighting. We're all more the same than different, and when we stop a moment......take the time to look each other in the eye, and really think and feel what our goal might be, sometimes it changes the situation.

          I remember as a child, when my father was in a rage, I would cower in my room shivering with fear, and think.....why doesnt he just talk about his fear.

          It is not surprising that later in my life I served as a mediator. I know this is no where near a war situation, but I mediated with convicted felons. They are always fighting amoung themselves and with correctional officers while incarcerated, and of course, that gets them into more trouble....they get put in solitary....it increases the time they spend in jail, and it compounds their problems.

          In the sessions, we spoke about the fact that we are more the same than different...the other guy is a brother, father, son...etc.....with all the same needs and wants, and many of the same emotions. Let's talk.

          Rick,
          I totally agree with you..."it's not the need to eliminate the disagreement", because that probably will always be a factor in the human condition. As individuals in our world, with many different cultural backgrounds, I think you are right, that we may never agree on everything. HOWEVER, there are ways to deal with disagreements other than abusing and/or killing each other. We, as a global community can learn different ways of conflict resolution.
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      Sep 3 2012: John, I was in Special Ops in Vietnam and we ate some of the same dirt. I second your idea and also feel some of the same pains.
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        Sep 3 2012: We still live.
        101st Airborne 2/506 E co. Recon, Charlie Team. Point man.

        Yes, I noticed I tried to give you a thumbs up but received a ted msg, saying no more for this member.
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          Sep 3 2012: I'm glad you still live dear John....I'm out of thumbs for you.....sending you an on-line hug:>)
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    Sep 12 2012: life is a wonderful gift... something to be thankful every single day.

    my piece of advice: live, live fully. But live your own life. trying to live (or direct) other's lives is not only futile, but a waste of the precious time you have left.

    cheers
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      Sep 12 2012: Very good advice. In the end, we travel from this life alone; at least from this side of the equation.

      But, it's not futile to offer assistance to someone whose direction will take them over the edge of a cliff. It's just being neighborly.
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        Sep 12 2012: True indeed... assistance to those in need is a great thing, John, specially assistance with no strings attached.

        But if I stop someone from jumping of what looks to me like the edge of a cliff and they see it as a dive in a wonderful lake, then it gets more complicated... :-)
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          Sep 12 2012: Complicated it does become. If it's just a wonderful lake then no harm done; right?
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    Sep 4 2012: I'm glad we are. Having an action plan with no deadline breeds procrastination and sloth.
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      Sep 4 2012: I'm glad your warranty runs out too my friend.
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        Sep 4 2012: wait, was that an uncalled for active aggressive sarcasm?
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          Sep 4 2012: You forgot to put a smiley face at the end of your post. :)

          Are you as young as you look in your Avatar?
    • Sep 4 2012: I'm glad we are too. However, it wont breed procrastination for the solid proactive type. On the other hand, we do tend to slip intoo our comfort zone and push away non-urgent material as if we're "living forever".

      Are you as young? : ) or is it the curious case of? : )
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        Sep 4 2012: Pauline, John,

        I'm as young / old as I appear, which is highly subjective to your perception of youth and old age.
        No one is as old as the person who has outlived enthusiasm and eagerness. : )

        I might be a curious case, just not in the button aspect!
        • Sep 4 2012: You carry your words quite well my friend.
          True, what's in an age? : )
          Here's a secret, I'm in my late thirties, inside I still feel like the 20 year old I was. Mind over matter.
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          Sep 5 2012: I get younger and younger each year.

          If I had to put a chronological age on how I feel inside, I'd say 19-25.
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          Sep 5 2012: Is that your real photo Imad Atwi?
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    Sep 4 2012: This is really very interesting logical question... Now i am 20yrs old and when i was 10 then i was thinking about how can i pass my school and the burden of study might be not easy to handle but as today i am doing my graduation and now thinking about the professional life.. When i see My parents and Grand parents and also many people of old age then i wonder how systematic they are in life means they have time for everything and their life seems to be smooth instead of tremendous responsibilities and i usually thought that whether the person i see in mirror can be like this or not.. One question that always arises is :" Can i handle the responsibilities of life".. As now i am freely living my life...
    But i feel that time teach you everything.....
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      Sep 4 2012: Live for today, but plan for tomorrow, Sam. The time will seem to pass quicker as you get older. That is not just my opinion, but studies have shown that as you age time seems to pass quicker (life-wise).

      I see so many people my age (58) who waited far too long to start planning for their retirement. And now they struggle just to make ends meet. It's a shame. Two rules I would encourage you to do, starting now:

      1. Start saving or investing at your age NOW. And don't put all your eggs in one basket. Be diversified. Many people are living a sub-standard retirement today because they lost most of everything in one "investment", whether it was a home value or by placing everything in one area like a Savings and Loan. Don't allow a "single point of failure" to ruin your future.

      2. Live for today, but use restraint. Plan for and invest in your future. So what if you die early and leave all that money in a retirement account? Won't make any difference. But it will make a huge difference if you live long enough to reach retirement and don't have the ability to actually DO it.

      I was fortunate enough to be able to fully retire at age 56. And that was with serving 25+ years in the military, which everybody knows is not a "get wealthy" occupation. You can do it too.
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        Sep 4 2012: Hi Rick,
        I cannot respond to your recent comment in which you posted a link.......
        The song is lovely...thanks:>)

        In keeping with the dance, living life theme, here's one of my favorite links:
        http://www.danceintherainmovie.com/

        I agree with you that time seems to pass by quicker the older we get. I remember my mom saying that when I was little...."time goes by so fast these days". I couldn't understand what she was talking about....it seemed like it was FOREVER to the next holiday....LOL!
        Now I understand:>)
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        Sep 4 2012: Good advice Rick. I'd add that every young person or couple, purchase a piece of land, in an isolated area as a first investment. It can be paid off relatively short term and is cheaper than getting the whole house land thing.

        Rent for the first years of their business life and pay this land off.

        Start building on the land perhaps as a get away spot using a modular design that can be updated into a home if they decide to do so. Grow a garden on this land and start creating a good soil base. Grow something even is it is nothing but clover.

        In the old days, property was the first investment of a person's financial structure. They built from there.

        I'd add to this make sure you treat your babysitter's well and with respect. :)
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          Sep 4 2012: This is funny and true my kindred soul friend:>)

          When my hubby came home from Vietnam, we had $2500.00 in savings. We wanted to buy a piece of land to eventually build a home. Our 2 yr. old daughter and I were living in an apartment attached to my parents home when he was in Vietnam, and that's where we continued to live for a time after he came home.

          We found a piece of land in an isolated area of a small village, and negociated with the farmer on price. The farmer was willing to sell six acres of land, and it was perfect for eventually building a home. The farmer said...."how much money do you have"? We said $2500.00. He said SOLD!

          We first built a tiny little cabin on the property where we stayed on weekends while preparing to build, and we had a garden there as well:>)
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      Sep 4 2012: In a way time does teach you everything you need to know to live this life. Time started moving real fast for me after I turned 45; there was so much left to do, so much unaccomplished. The next thing I knew I was 50, then 55, now I'm 60. It went by very fast.
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        Sep 4 2012: We have the opportunity to learn throughout our lives WHEN/IF we pay attention:>)
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          Sep 4 2012: You've been a very busy little girl Colleen. I remember some of the times my sister and I huddled in the room when dad was having one of his episodes. It's strange how it toughens up a child.
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        Sep 4 2012: Yes indeed John, I've been a very busy little girl and a busy big girl/woman....just as you have been a busy boy/man:>) I believe our experiences either toughen us up, or break us down....depends on how we use the information....don't you think? You've probably heard the phrase "what doesn't kill us makes us stronger"? I'm pretty sure you have experienced this huh?

        I learned some very important lessons from my father.....how NOT to "BE" in this world. Nobody ever told me that life was going to be easy, and I am not one to be complaisant. I will be learning, growing and evolving while taking my last breath on this earth school:>)

        Maybe that's why I don't mind growing old and passing on....might be a nice respite....LOL:>)
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          Sep 4 2012: thumbs up for Colleen.

          I think we might be kindred souls.

          Speaking of what doesn't kill us makes us stronger. We've had a cold for three weeks now and it is getting real old fast.

          I understand the lesson of "How not to be" and I've lived it most of my life.

          You know, I likie growing old also. It's been a good phase of my life. I've Cemented the idea that life doesn't end here and I'm a little giddy (at times) about seeing the other side. I'm expectant, not fearful. I think I know what lies beyond and I think it will be vastly different.

          I've established the idea that my contributions to the world will, for the most part, go unnoticed but I feel I have affected people's lives and the way they think on a small scale. These affects will continue to travel on this plane of life and have an impact.

          I feel better now. :)
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          Sep 4 2012: Nurturing vs. tough fathers does not "predict" anything about one's emotional make-up later in life and their subsequent belief system. Your "theory bin" is a little messed up! It depends on how one uses the information.
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          Sep 4 2012: Don, my father was unnaturally strong, very smart, and had some serious control issues. He was an alcoholic and wife beater. Both my sister and I were entertaining the idea of writing a book about our life. My physiologist told me to make it a fiction book because no one would believe it.

          It was my grandmother who enabled me to rise above the life I grew up in as a young boy. I left home at age 17, joined the Army and became a man, capable of affronting my father, as my brothers also did. Eventually, we put him in his place and he left us alone.

          When my father died, I struck him to make sure he was dead, made sure it was his body in the coffin and stayed till the last shovel full of dirt was heaped on his grave. All my nightmares went away.

          My sister, soon after my father died, committed suicide.

          But, even with all of this it was a love/hate relationship. My father could be the most loving, caring, helpful human being on earth. Of course I blame most of his evil on the alcohol.

          He loved to insult other men by getting fresh with their wives. He was eager for a fight and very good at it. He loved to hang around in dirt floor bars and boss other people around, telling them how they should live their lives.

          To my knowledge, I'm the only man that has defeated him. I think I was just lucky. He was proud of his large roll of money he carried in his pocket.

          My mother doesn't want to talk or see me because she say's I remind her of my father. I've called many women "mom". Too many to count. My father was also a very handsome man, by most women's standards and there was no shortage of mom's in my life.

          My family remains shattered to this day.

          To some it may be hard to realize that I was able to rise above all this and become a normal person with an emphatic nature. I owe all this to my grandmother and my Uncles.

          I have friends who have lived an even more horrible life as children. There are worse things in life than the Devil.
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        Sep 4 2012: John,
        Three weeks is too long for a cold. You might want to check on that and see if it is something more?

        That being said, I think/feel one day is enough for a cold. Lots of chicken soup, of course,....lots of fluids....did you ever try echinacea? It's an herb that supports the imune system. We could dig the roots in my garden, but that probably is not very practical for you at the moment. It comes in tablet form at the pharmacy:>) And I LOVE VICKS. My mom used to slather that on the chest and neck when we had a cold and I still love it....probably a LOT of emotional "stuff" there for me:>)

        Be well my friend:>)
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          Sep 4 2012: We've tried all the normal remedy sets and are in contact with our doctor. Even my dog and cat are sick. I've taken samples of their Flem and done some cultures and examined them under the microscope. I'm convinced it some sort of Virus.

          It's one of those roller coaster ride Viruses were you seem to get better then get worse, yet, still have the strength to conduct business. It appears to be going around so it is not isolated to our home environment.

          I'm going to start juicing today and see if that helps.
          Vicks is a keeper. :)
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        Sep 4 2012: Sorry John....sending you all loving, healing energy:>)
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      Sep 4 2012: As I travel the path of life, I sometimes find something my parents/grandparents, said or did, useful in solving a problem I'm confronted with.
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          Sep 4 2012: If we have time to analysis the situation Don. Situations in real time presuppose we have a store of wisdom to work with. Sometimes, in the darkness of the moment, we have trouble accessing those stores of wisdom.
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          Sep 4 2012: I am not God Don, nor does he advise or seek my advice.

          by "Keep the faith" I'm suggesting you walk tall and keep the shoulders straight in the face of adversity. You know, don't let them see you flinch.
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    Sep 2 2012: Oh yeah! whenever I see my mom who is very old and weak due to poor health conditions I use to think how she had adjusted her life with those severe circumstances. I do remember that I had some psychological problems and I often thought of suicide so my question is that how old people adjust their minds according to these severe conditions???
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      Sep 2 2012: I try to remember things my parents, grand parents, did or said. My father once told me this saying he discovered as a child living through the Great Depression.:

      " I had no shoes and complained until I met a man who had no feet."

      My father always had a $5,000.00 role of bills in his pocket. He was a junk man --I grew up in a junk yard. He always dealt in cash, never paid one cent in taxes his whole life. This is hard to do in this age of computers.

      At his funeral, he had them play his favorite song by Frank Sinatra, "I did it my way."

      He was a great inspiration in my life and I was always at odds with his 5th grade education, especially on the subject of science. I've seen him do things with levers and pulleys that blow my mind to this day. He, truly, could move a mountain, if he wanted to, without the aid of electrical power. I believe, if he thought about it, he could tell you how the pyramids were really built, but the subject didn't come up in those days.
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        Sep 3 2012: My mom had a great sense of humor, and in her later years (80s), while repeating her morning ritual of coffee and the news paper, she would look in the obituaries first, then comment, with a smile on her face...."well, my name isn't there this morning, so I guess I'll go on with the day".

        I LOVE the song "I did it my way".....maybe I'll use that one as well:>)
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        Sep 3 2012: Dear John,
        This song was planted in my head and heart when I saw your comment early this morning and I cannot let go of it as it keeps flowing through me. It is a very powerful song which touches me deeply, bringing tears of joy.....thanks.....enjoy:>)

        http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ljrFQyE1hAg&feature=related
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      Sep 3 2012: Noveed,
      I highly recommend practicing "adjusting" and accepting things you cannot change BEFORE you start to age.
      In observing myself and other people as we age, it seems that a sense of humor is a great tool to use throughout the process. A sense of humor....being able to laugh at myself at times, has helped me through many life challenges.

      "Blessed are they who can laugh at themselves, for they shall never cease to be amused":>)
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        Sep 3 2012: I'm sorry Colleen and to others and John.

        In my late teens i worked at a obstetric and geriatric hospital which was very 60's in nz design.i was just a cleaner/orderly,the best years of my life and something i learned was that a person in their sixties is still a spring chicken,you guys have strange ideas of what old is. Lol i'm teasing.Colleen you should write a book,this may seem strange but i've been seriously contemplating that when the time comes that is close then it would be better to go bush and never come back,not that i advocate this to anyone,for myself i don't want to be a burden to anyone or on a strained system as it is,so the question really remains is,could i do it?
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          Sep 3 2012: To each his own Ken.

          I worked as a Suicide Prevention Counselor, handling the phones for two years. I've heard every story there is. As a counselor we were restricted from condoning acts of self-harm and we practiced with one another constantly to discipline our minds.

          Yours is a hard question to answer. Only you know what you can or can't do.
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          Sep 3 2012: What is my book going to be about Ken?

          I agree with you....we're all still "spring chickens", and a few of our feathers are ruffled! LOL!

          You are the only one who can answer your question Ken. None of us wants to be a burden, and whether we are, or not, is kind of subjective, don't you think?

          I have a brother who is in his 80s, physically challenged, and I keep inviting him to live with me. He doesn't want to be a "burden" to me, and I keep telling him that if I thought he would be a burden, I would not make the offer. Doesn't matter what I say, he wants to maintain his independance, and I admire him for that.

          I've also worked on the hotline in a shelter, and heard lots of amazing stories. You know more about yourself than anyone else knows, and you are the only one who can answer your own questions. We can all take in information provided by others, and ultimately, the choices we make are up to us.
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        Sep 4 2012: Thanks Colleen

        You are right that we should practice to improve sense of humor but at that moment I was totally different from the way i use to live now. The stage of depression remained for a long time what i observed to get rid of it was to engage myself in different volunteer works and keeping myself busy. At the moment i am living a good life although still when i use to remember those moments they still set me on fire but now i am totally aware that how to handle it and that is to laughing and smiling with friends and before the mirror.
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          Sep 4 2012: Dear Noveed,
          Your original comment seems to address two different things? Aging and depression?Sorry that my comment was not more clear, because I focused more on the aging process when I suggested that a sense of humor is helpful.

          It certainly is difficult to hang onto a sense of humor if we are feeling depressed. It's interesting that aging can cause depression, and depression can cause a person to feel older and more challenged.....another cycle.

          It appears that you took appropriate steps to move through the depression...engage in volunteer work and keeping busy.....excellent choices! I'm also glad that you discovered the benefit of laughing, smiling with friends and smiling at yourself in the mirror....good practices. I'm sure you know that laughing/smiling releases healing energizing endorphines in our body/mind? Laughter really IS good medicine:>)
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        Sep 4 2012: The Book? Why your life of course,in fact everyone here should write one,it's a time honored tradition,a living history and with the net there are sites where you can load it to and continually upgrade it,i just don't know of any,so i guess i'll have to look around.

        You American's! you built the net,look don't take this literally but this woman stated that America's future lies not in power but to become great teachers.
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          Sep 4 2012: Hi Ken,
          Yes, they often recommend writing a journal as good therapy for oneself. And I truly believe that we connect with each other by sharing our stories...we are more the same than different:>)

          Now...take it easy on the Americans Ken......LOL:>)
          What "woman" are you talking about in your comment?
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        Sep 4 2012: Nice one Juliette and it was already a way of inspiration for me but sometimes i think no doubt the person in the video looks like he has no problem to live in this way but the thing is that in his past life he might have faced problems because no one born happy but the practice and patience is the thing he had alter his disability in a wonderful thing......
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        Sep 4 2012: Hi Juliette and Noveed,
        Nick Vujicic is a GREAT inspiration for many people. This is my favorite video of his, and the one I send to people who are feeling low:>) His enthusiasm and joy with life is awesome.....

        http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gc4HGQHgeFE

        I agree Noveed that the practice and patience he has with himself is simply amazing!

        YOU ARE WELCOME JULIETTE:>)
        The video you first posted is good, and it is the most "quiet" I've ever seen Nick. Most of his videos I've seen are very playful!

        I seem to be out of "thumbs" for you Juliette....sending you a smile and a hug:>)
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      Sep 4 2012: Hey Noveed.
      Adjustments are the part of life. We have to adjust ourselves according to the circumstances and nowadays many people thinks that adjustments can make people weak but the scenario is totally different. Everyone made adjustments in life but what make difference is the time at which is has been made. As Coleen mam describes that the sense of humor is so important.
      And my favorite line is " Always Learn to give preferences" ..
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        Sep 4 2012: Hello again Sam:>)
        Good point....adjustments are a part of life. I wholeheartedly agree with you that adjustments do not make us weak. It may depend on HOW we make the adjustments....do you think? If we know ourselves well, and are adjusting in a way that benefits ourselves as well as the whole, then adjustments are empowering. I like your line...."Always Learn to give preferences".

        One thing that helps me make benificial adjustments, and realize my preferences is this little mantra:
        "Grant me the serenity to accept things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the difference".

        I cannot change the fact that I will grow old and die, so I accept that fact, and do not spend time or energy worrying about it.

        I realize that I have courage enough to live life with gusto, to the best of my ability at any given time, and I know it is important to take care of the body as much as I can, so I do those things to the best of my ability. When we "know" ourselves it is easier to know the difference between what we can and cannot change. We then know more about how we can adjust to our preferences:>)

        BTW,
        I tell my Cardinal friend hello for you every morning, and he sends the hello message back to you:>)
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          Sep 12 2012: That's so sweet of you.... please keep exchanges our hello messages... as now i have one flying friend. Thanks a lot.
          And your each comment always motivates me. I don't know why but i feel really fresh after see your name.
          thanks for sharing your experience.
          i need to learn lot from you.
          Actually earlier i used to say no to adjustment but with time i start feel that adjustments are necessary. Even if you have courage to change some things then also sometime its important, if not for yourself then for others sometime. I do not mean that one must adjust but i am just saying that adjustment is not bad..
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        Sep 4 2012: yap Sam I am totally agree and the reply which I was gonna share with you already shared by Colleen. Thanks Colleen. :)
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          Sep 4 2012: Noveed my friend......you make me do all the writing work!!! LOL:>)
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        Sep 12 2012: Hi Sam,
        I bet you have many flying, feathered friends, and I will continue to say hello to our Cardinal friend from his friend Sam.

        Thank you so much for your kind words. It is also refreshing to see you every time my friend:>)

        I think the more adjustments or changes we make, the more and more comfortable it becomes. I actually like change, and intentionally create little changes in my life so when the big changes that I cannot control happen, I accept easier.
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    Sep 2 2012: Don't make a girl a promise that you can't keep.
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    Sep 2 2012: I'd say to live every day and week with love and integrity. Then when it all ends, whenever that turns out to be, you can close your eyes without regret.
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    Sep 13 2012: I've had many messages ask me to personally tell how I really feel about God, county, the Universe and reality and the responsibility of the old to the young.

    Taken back too our root, we are all brothers and sisters. Like all siblings, we squabble about things and strive to make sure we get our fair share.

    Sometimes I think, when looking at all humanity, that we never grow up.

    But I'm an old man,not as old as some, but definitely in the winter of my life.

    I've made a lot of mistake but I've amounted a large plot of wisdom. I pay attention to what people say. I want to know how they feel.

    I think my generations biggest mistake was in not following up on the philosophies we developed during the 60's through the 80's. We became the politicians and industrialists we stood together so valiantly against in our younger years. We didn't pass these philosophies along to our children. But it isn't too late to pass them on to our grandchildren.

    What we of the older generation need is a code that we can live by so we can teach our grandchildren well. Many of us have lost our wisdom to Alzheimer Disease. Many of us are attending to our parents of the WWII generation who are crossing over everyday now.

    We see our true destiny in life on this earth. We see the end of our journey, everywhere we look. We have learned the true lesson of life that, Life is a Journey to death and all we have learned can just a easily be lost before we cross over. So what is the meaning of life? I don't know. But I do know that while we are alive our most pressing responsibility is to teach our children as well as we can so they don't make the same mistakes that we did; they must continue to search for the answers.


    Just about everything I feel about the older generations responsibility to the young is summed up in this one song by Crosby, Nash, Stills and Young.

    You can hear it here : http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EkaKwXddT_I&feature=related
  • Sep 12 2012: Each persons life is different baised on where they live and what they experience in their life so some of your questions will be answered by a person that all ready has liven a life but most of it is unknown because each generation is different from that last and it is moving even fast with the introduction to technology so each persons situations will be different and faced with different chalenges that the previous generation might not any concept about so what i think im trying to say that a older person with more experience then a younger person will be able to help in a general way. correct me if im wrong
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      Sep 12 2012: Sounds okay to me. The old can also learn from the young I might add. Playing with my grandchildren, I see many mistakes I may have made with their parents when they were young.
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      Sep 5 2012: What I mean Don, is I will delete this comment because it has little relevance with the topic but does address an individual concern at the moment.
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      Sep 5 2012: I guess I could say you are off topic Don, but perhaps you aren't. We grow old. We peer into the face of our own mortality and we wonder what comes next. I guess our relationship with God is part of growing old for many people.

      My topic was actually intended to give the younger set a forum to ask about what it is like to grow old in the hopes it might help them sort through their day to day lives, and a venue for older folk to ask each other how they are affected.

      I guess religion is qualified ideal but preaching does not necessarily fit into the big picture I would like to frame here. I hope you understand.

      I have started another question on TED that relates to the very Question of God, a creator of the Universe and mankind. You might check it out.
  • Sep 4 2012: One advice. Be true to the dream of your youth.
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      Sep 4 2012: I wanted to be the first astronaut to land on mars but I had other dreams also. :)

      There are little moonstroller's about. :)
      • Sep 4 2012: No harm in pursuing or tweaking your dreams, just a littlel bit.
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      Sep 4 2012: I'm hoping heaven will be busy, our strength without limit and there will be ample opportunity to satisfy my endless, list of questions.
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          Sep 5 2012: Looks like there's a blow coming up Mates. I better tuck in the sails a bit.
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          Sep 5 2012: Don, I read the whole conversation.

          You were sucked in, I see that clearly. The guy who posted the question needs to understand that some people will debate just as hard to support their belief as those who don't. It was a bit of a flaming conversation but I wouldn't go so far as to blame it on you that the poster shut it down.

          If you can't handle the heat, don't turn the burner on in the first place.

          Some people don't take Religious people's belief system seriously until it comes flying in through the window of your office building or somebody sneaks into your house with some, not so nice intentions.

          If the Muslims don't want me making fun of Mohammad, it's a little thing to me and I can live with that. If they want to debate the Morality vs. God issue publicly in an open forum, I will be there with bells on and I expect retorts from Religious folk. That doesn't mean you have to be openly disrespectful of their comments or their belief system. You have to respect the other persons opinion and and no name calling. That's the civil rule --No name calling.

          Not everyone can live with the God idea. Not everyone can live without it. So what?

          There is no Good or Bad, just people acting in profoundly differing ways on either side of a polarized idea.


          This comment will self-destruct in a few hours. Sorry to slide off topic.
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      Sep 4 2012: Don said: "Which mysteriously, reciprocates the kindness many times over."

      Sometimes it does Don. Sometimes there is a lesson to learn.
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    Sep 2 2012: The uselessness of being old. I don't think we live in a society where old people have so many perks, let alone purposes.
    Old people and sick people are treated alike. Few take care of their grandchildren.
    In some time I'll be pushed back into self-centered occupations and childlike distractions, and there's not much that I'll be able to do which I can't do better now.
    So I better do it now.
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      Sep 2 2012: I agree. I'm taking care of an Alzheimer father. I don't want to live in that situation. I think I would prefer Euthanasia. I sometimes find myself in a rush to learn something I think is relevant to my understanding so I won't leave too many unanswered questions behind. I've only got about 5 maybe 10 years if I'm lucky.
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        Sep 2 2012: Old Michelangelo is running in the snow, the lengendary story goes. A passer-by is puzzled and asks : "In this dreadful weather, where is this old man going with such haste?"
        "To school, to learn something new."