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How do you manipulate yourself - positively?

Your mind/part of it, knows that something should be done, the rest of you doesn't want to. What do you do?

I've read about intelligent procrastination. When attempting this, you deceive yourself into believing which tasks are more important than others. This stems from the conviction that you're bound to pick things to do of lesser importance, than the most important ones on your list.
In my opinion, intelligent procrastination is a way of intelligently putting your focus where you think it can make the biggest impact. E.g. you sometimes pick the easier task, of two, where the other is obviously more important, just because of the implied difficulty of the job and the quicker fulfillment of a job finished.

Another way I found to do things is doing them as they pop up in my head. I spend more time being effective overall, but I might not be doing things in the best way. E.g. you do not minimize time consumption on traveling, because the order of tasks isn't optimized. Overall I do think things through, but I feel I could be more effective and I’m looking for input.

Please look away from the mental age the above suggests and spelling errors, this is not my main language. First time posting, be kind.

If you understood the question differently, by all means describe that as well, together with your take on the question.



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  • Jul 30 2012: I had my hopes up for some fancy whoop-ti-doo, like hypnotizing yourself, a special questioning/exercise system for yourself, or a special just-do-it mindset I could adapt.

    My best line of thinking currently is: You have to be able to trust in yourself no matter what, and it is something you gradually build up, by only committing to promises you can keep. That way, even if you do occasionally make a promise that is hard, you know you only make promises you can keep, thus it forces you forward. Here I would simply spend more time deciding answers such as “yes” and “no”.
    In this line of thinking, could there be any other personal skills you can build up, and how to?
    Maybe this should focus more on motivation, I'm trying to learn something new, so I'm not quite sure what I'm looking for:
    Some things that motivate me:
    - Inspirational movies where something is done that was hard, or where people live poorly, as I hope to live a life where money is a lesser concern than currently.
    - Facts about family, friends, and people in different countries. E.g. China with some insane child prodigies, studying in metro stations to practice focus with a lot of noise around.
    - Stories about others, my latest read was Steve Jobs by Walter Isaacson, I feel some of his traits mirror my own. His career choice was compelling for me, and it has made me question my current pursuit in economics, which I feel is more a matter of me knowing I have to pick fast, and my family giving me input, than completely my own pick, based on interests. I feel more creative than those numbers. I want to create actual value, not just loop money around in fancy ways.
    - My wish to show my ex-girlfriend, and others that I am special.
    - My wish to leave behind a legacy of some kind. Something that would make people’s lives happier.
    - The thrill I get when something succeeds.
    - Dreams.
    Maybe, if I gave this more thought, I could have it all boiled down to something I could remind myself about, and then work harder
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      Jul 30 2012: Dear Peter,
      You are not alone in hoping for some fancy whoop-ti-doo exercise system, method or practice to create a more positive life experience. There are many practices that can contribute to contentment/happiness in our lives. The most important practice for me, in the past 60+ years is to be aware, mindful, and fully engaged in each and every moment. It is many times the very simple things that have great consequences.

      I'll tell you a true story, which contributed to opening my mind and heart to the moment.
      After regaining consciousness from a near fatal head/brain injury and emergency craniotomy 22 years ago, I received hundreds of cards/letters/greetings and wishes for good health. Often, the note would start out by saying..."you probably don't remember me, but 5 years ago, you said something to me that changed my life"....or "10 years ago, you did something for me that changed my life".

      I DID indeed remember all these people, and I remembered mostly, that I didn't do anything special...simply being kind to/with them. My words and actions changed people's lives??? WOW!!! That was a pretty special message for me. It caused me to be even more mindfully aware in each and every moment.

      We can experience motivation, awareness of other people, awareness of what we are learning in each moment, awareness of our world, our environment and the people living with us side by side, and as you say, we may get information from a movie, a book, an activity, conversations with people, etc. We may be motivated by simply sitting in the gardens and pondering.....that's one of my favorites:>) The point I'm trying to make, is that our life adventure can be many small experiences rolled into one to create the meaning that we are seeking. It doesn't have to be a "fancy whoop-ti-doo", as you joyfully say:>) Make any sense?
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      Jul 30 2012: Believe me Peter, I am still hoping for a "magic bullet" a phrase in English which means an easy way to make hard things easy and if I just waited, I would have wasted a lot of time by my age. You already know how to work hard. Please finish your degree in Economics. One of my own sons just got his in that same subject (by his own choice). With this knowledge you can move on to anything you want to study. If your parents cannot fund it - you will pursue your bliss with hard work. I know it is not pretty but it will be the making of you! You are doing all the things that I would and have done for inspiration short of loving a child (unless I am unaware of that part of your life). Loving someone else madly and completely can almost be that magic bulltet.
      You want your ex to know you are special and I can certainly relate to that human longing. However, that can only happen when you know it and you will only know it when you have followed your bliss and busted your rump to make it happen for yourself because until you do there will always be an undermining voice within that says things like "but these are only numbers' or 'these are only theories" or "you could have worked harder". Until you have valid answers for your own inner questions, whatever they might be you will never see your self esteem reflected in your beloved's eyes. BELIEVE me. there will come a day when a woman so far superior to your ex will adore you that you will wonder why you missed your ex! You will make that happen for yourself -without a magic bullet!
      As to others and your studies or career - they will not believe your words - they will believe and support WHATEVER you truly believe in! With love from Canada!
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      Jul 30 2012: I agree with Debra that finishing your degree in economics does not tie you to a career in "looping money around." Economics studies the behavior of individuals and organizations, as well as the environments in which either might learn and innovate. So what you learn in the way of analytical infrastructure should have generic value as part of a tool kit to understand the world around you.
      I like your idea of showing yourself you can keep promises. It's a bit like the idea of scattering along your path doable tasks of increasing challenge as a way of encouraging yourself that you can do things you undertake, even when stretching to a level above where you are is involved.
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        Jul 30 2012: I need an extra ten thumbs for you Fritzie, well said!
      • Jul 31 2012: Thank you, your reponses matter a lot to me.

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