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Fonkou Djoendia

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What do I do with my life? How do I make my dreams become my reality?

First of all, thank you so much for reading this. It means a lot.
My name is Fonkou and I am a highschool student.
I believe that my purpose in life is to inspire others to be themseleves and to love who they are. I love helping people. When I am not helping or inspiring someone, I feel so empty and lost. I know it my calling. And I really want to be a motivational speaker, or maybe have my own talk show one day.
But you know its not easy. I wish there was a specific path i could take to get there. Its all luck and chance. If I wanted to be a doctor, there is a specific path to follow where you are almost gaureented to have a job after you're done. But with the field I want to be in. its hard. I don't even know what to major in in college. I am so lost and scared. Someone has any advice? Please if you do, let me know.

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    Jun 20 2012: Well sir my advise is a simple as it gets follow your nose always. You seem to have a good grasp of what you want. You know better than anyone what will get you there. You set your own morals and values stick to them. Then stay on that path and it will lead you to your calling. On a finale note we all get scared a little about this time in life and you will make it through there are a lot more things in life to give you a scare.
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    Jun 13 2012: Hi Fonkou, that's great that you have a clear vision on the path you would like to take with your career; many of my friends are in their 30s and are still trying to figure out what they want to do with their lives! So you're not alone and you're way ahead of the game.

    Luckily for you, there are some clear career paths you can take in the field of motivational speaking, and ultimately a talk show host if you choose. I'll just throw out some ideas and see what starts to speak to you:

    1) Start with the website Positively Positive. Check out the "Contributors" section and you will see a ton of people that are already doing what you hope to do one day. Read their stories, check out their websites, and most importantly, ALWAYS feel free to email them directly to ask for guidance...you'll be surprised how many people will be willing to give you feedback: http://www.positivelypositive.com/contributors/

    2) One of the quickest things you can do to start down the path of becoming a motivational speaker, or a helpful guide for your age range, is to start a blog. You can start a blog for free on Tumblr (probably the easiest to setup), or Wordpress. Once you have the blog setup, it will give you a platform to be able to reach out to all the people on Positively Positive ( or anyone that inspires you for that matter ) and say "Hey, I have a blog that helps high school students find their calling or career path, would you mind if I asked you 5 questions about your career path and share it on my blog?" - this will allow you to learn a ton about how people succeed in your field, and will help many others in your situation....all the while you'll be creating an audience for your speaking.

    Set small monthly goals for yourself, Google schools for Life Coaching, Psychology is a great field, practice public speaking, and don't worry, you can inspire people in any field!

    I'm out of space, so respond w/ questions or ask for advice on my site http://www.smashthecurve.com/advice/
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      Jun 14 2012: This helped me a lot! Thanks so much for taking you time to offer me some advice!
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    Jun 7 2012: There are many ways to help people. You may want to explore the options and determine what is the best fit for you. You can't find the way until you are sure you know where you are going. You have chosen a big field with many choices. Explore the diversity and then narrow it down to what feels right.

    Determine who your best role models are, and find out how they got to be where they are. That will give you a sense of the path you may have to take. Also, don't forget your intuition. It can be your best friend.

    Anyone who is good at what they do will find work. If you are true to yourself and you stay focused, the right fit may find you. Just keep your options open and keep working toward your goal.
  • T Rose

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    Jun 7 2012: First off, make sure your desire to help people is not coming from a place of ego. There are a lot of shit gurus out there who may be offering pieces of good advice as well as a lot of bunk and it's hard to know which are the gems and which to discard at a young age. If you really want to help people, it seems to me that you have to have a lot of knowledge about human nature as well as a long history of life experiences.

    When I look back at the stuff I believed when I was in my 20s and 30s, I am relieved I didn't publish or go out and speak publicly because as I got older, I realized a lot of it was idealistic as opposed to realistic.

    Also, I notice that people in the public eye "get stuck" in their own raps and fail to evolve as people. Oprah, Chopra, Dyer are still peddling the same crap they've always been and most of it is nothing more than "feel good" new age bs that doesn't actually offer anything concrete that helps people to better their lives overall. Tell people what they want to hear and the money will follow but at the end of the day, nothing's really changed except the numbers in your bank account.

    I'm waiting until I'm older to go public--if I go public at all. I'm currently 47. I'd suggest learning about psychology and philosophy if you want to help the masses and to wait until you are much older before you start telling other people how to live. Also, try to objectively observe what other people are doing and what does and doesn't work as well as discern whether or not they are lying about their happiness, achievements, methods for living, etc. Most people are simply rationalizing and make huge compromises in their lives and then try to tell you why you should too. They also fail to take into account opportunities they had or simple strokes of luck that contributed to their successes.

    You say you're lost and scared so I suggest you keep looking and don't settle for any "answers" that don't feel 100% right. Be 100% honest w/yourself at all times
  • P C

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    Jun 7 2012: Everybody's Free to Wear Sunscreen song:
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xfq_A8nXMsQ

    Remember there's a difference between education and training. Mike is right about communication. Oprah Winfrey was a journalist who later became a talk show host. In terms of getting an education and become a more well-rounded person, a college degree in communication might be the right path. But one of the best places to get training is to possibly get a job with the Dale Carnegie Institute or Injoy. Maybe you want to focus on a different aspect of the motivational speaking industry other than leadership. Just research who's giving such talks right now and see if you can become an intern there. Religious leaders are often motivational speakers. A cousin of mine who worked during the summers for Injoy told me that it was a disillusioning experience seeing the motivational speaking industry from the inside. So be warned.
  • Jun 7 2012: Perhaps, you could start with psychology in order to gain a foothold before going into public speaking. It would give you an opportunity to gain a better understanding of what the individual needs; thereby, making you a much stronger and influential speaker.
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      Jun 7 2012: Thank you soo much:) I am currently taking a psychology class at school! I love it! I think it has helped me a lot!
  • Jun 6 2012: Try this little thought experiment.
    You are 100 years old and sitting on your rocker on the veranda sipping an organic lemonade thinking back on a life well-lived. Can you imagine that clearly? Imagine the strong feeling of contentment you will have and let it permeate you.... Now, what is it you have to do in the next 80 years to get that feeling then. Details aren't important but with every choice you make ask yourself, "Is this taking me towards that satisfied future?" If so then great! If not, then do something else. Your instincts are a good compass to follow.
    Communications may the direction to aim for in college, though be warned they will likely try to turn you into a marketer. But you can use effective communications to further any goal in life!
    Best wishes. I think you are off to a great start by reaching out!
    Mike
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      Jun 7 2012: That really helped me! Although, I wouldnt want to live until I'm a 100! Ahahaha! But that helped a lot. I haven't been making effective decisions so far in my life, mainly because I have the fear of disappointing my parents.
      • Jun 7 2012: You say that now. When you are 48 like me it seems a reasonable goal! I wanted to live fast and die young, but now I want to live fast and die old. 100 years sounds like a lot but it is just a drop in the river of time...
        Communications is a pretty broad and flexible field. A lot of education needs to be approached as an active rather than passive learner; you take away what you put into it. There are many opportunities to do good with an ability to effectively and professionally communicate. Environmental and social change organizations need people who can help persuade people to move in more positive directions.
        The fact that you are here speaks volumes already. You are going to do just fine!
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      Jun 7 2012: Oh and also, I did some research on Communications, and people have some negative things to say about it. Seems like the cons outweighs the Pros.......
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    Jun 6 2012: Hi Fonkou! I'm also a highschool student rightnow and I feel exactly the same way!
    I've always loved inspiring people, helping and guiding others.

    One question. What are your dreams?

    I'll tell you what I'm doing. I love painting and drawing, I love expressing my emotions and thoughts through Art (and writing). So, I made a website with my artworks (you can see it in my profile). Also, as I stated above, I love helping others. Therefore I started a Literature and Arts Magazine at my school, where other students can share their emotions and thoughts through artworks and writings!

    As for the inspirational aspect of my goals, I'm planning on holding a TEDx event in my country! Maybe some will think that it's a little far-fetched that a high schooler is hosting a big event such as this, but I believe that if the purpose is to spread ideas/inspire others, it's all worth it.
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      Jun 7 2012: Omg darling! It feels so amazing to have someone I can really relate to! I don't even know you but you sound totally amazing. Nothing is more inspiring than a young person that knows who they are and what their purpose is. You have really inspired me already, I hope you know that. And I checked out your profile, AMAZING! Honestly, Keep doing what you do. And thank you so much for taking your time to help me:) Stay beautiful