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Rosjke Hasseldine

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Why is the mother-daughter relationship so marginalized within the media, education, and society?

I have come to understand that the mother-daughter relationship is marginalized because it is the root of women's power. Having worked as a counselor and psychotherapist specializing in mothers and daughters for over fifteen years I've witnessed first hand the power this relationship has to challenge and change gender stereotypes that limit women's voice and freedom and help the next generation of women claim their equal place at all tables of power. Marginalizing this key female relationship through lack of publishing, discussion, and limiting it into mothers with difficult teenage daughters or daughters with difficult elderly mothers stops us recognized how this relationship spans the life time and generations. It holds the power to educate the next generation of women to claim a different space than their mothers, and it has the fire of wanting something badly that we will do what it takes to make sure our daughters have a different experience than we have had. Marginalizing mothers and daughters also makes our female history invisible. Let's talk about our relationship with our mothers and discover how much greatness is hidden within these women's lives. Rosjke Hasseldine

Topics: Gender equality Motherhood Women's Empowerment Women's History Women's experiences feminism
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    David Hamilton 50+

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    Jun 14 2012: It's kind of a weird thing to say as a man... but... I think the root problem might be, that, until about 100 years ago, the mother daughter relationship was pretty awful, almost worldwide. In most religious cultures, a mother teaches her daughter how to be a good wife, starting at a very young age.

    Basically, your mom used to teach you how to be a mans servant. Only recently have women had the opportunity to explore and fully unlock the potential of this relationship. There aren't many role models yet, but I don't think it is particularly marginallized, so much as it's in infancy.

    Why doesn't the media talk about this relationship in more detail, because you haven't written about it yet : p
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    Ana Sibrian

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    May 31 2012: I don't think the problem is the lack of representation of the mother-daughter relationship, in fact I think this phenomenon falls under the umbrella of the lack of representation of female-female relationships in the media in general. I feel like most films and TV shows only show how women relate to each other in relationship to the men in their lives, for example, two women with the same love interest. While there definitely is a lack of representation of female relationships, I do think in the past decade or so there has been an increase in shows and films that portray these relationships without men. Good examples are Sex and the City, Desperate Housewives, Bridesmaids, The Women (which actually doesn't show any male characters.) But of course that's just a handful, there's still a lot to improve!
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    Debra Smith 200+

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    May 22 2012: It might be because we ourselves have so much trouble getting a real handle on this relationship.

  • Rhona Pavis 50+

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    May 18 2012: Because women are not valued correctly.
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    Gurinder Ahluwalia 10+

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    May 16 2012: Its not mother daughter relationship that are changing with developments of information communication technologies. The rise of communication technology gives us a false sense of belonging through 24x7 a/v connectivity. Two people actually living far apart physically tend to substitute talking with touching for relationship. Women traditionally has been center of the family with men & others revolved around her for succor & feeling of home. Women has left that role in search of greener pastures resulting in that she no longer remains center of the family. The present society has accepted greater mobility of people connected through technology, hence traditional physical proximity has been diluted.
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    Fritzie Reisner 100+

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    May 16 2012: In what sense do you believe publishing and discussion marginalize the mother-daughter relationship? I would have said that the importance of family is very well established and often discussed across the political spectrum and in agencies and professions that involve service to children. Even in the modern family, the mother typically is assumed to be very central in the development of both daughters and sons. I do not know whether this key relationship is marginalized in popular television, but you specifically mentioned "publishing and discussion."
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