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Khushal Khan Khattak

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Marriage and divorce!!! Both mean the same thing!!???

Some of the major reasons for Divorce:

Prior to 1965 the divorce rate was 2% to 3%. By 1985 divorce rates had escalated to 50% and have essentially remained the same.

Many young people have unrealistic expectations of marriage, expecting their relationship to be the perfect union. Their parents were poor role models and they are not prepared to work at their relationship.

Today's young couples are products of the "me generation." They are self-absorbed, focused on getting "my needs" met, but are often insensitive to the particular needs of their partner.

Mates want instant gratification, seeking the material goods their parents worked years to accumulate.

Many spouses have had multiple sexual partners prior to marriage. The parties are jaded and quickly discover how difficult it is to sustain a romantic relationship in the bedroom when they are beset with overwhelming conflicts in the kitchen.

Marital infidelity is all too frequent for some mates who show little guilt or remorse for their actions.

Often partners have little understanding of the concept of loyalty and sacrifice so essential to a good marriage.

Many young couples are products of divorced homes, thus permission to divorce is taken for granted.

Today's couples enter marriage with an expectation their union may not last a lifetime, as if theirs is a "trial marriage."

Some view "serial marriages" as easy come/easy go, but the fallout of betrayal, abandonment, neglect, and despair take their toll, nonetheless.

Many partners are anchorless, searching for their identity. They often feel as if, "I'm afloat and on my own in both marriage and career."

Many spouses are restless and impatient. When the first blush of romance fades , hostilities escalate, they impulsively throw in the sponge and give up.

So my question for you, Folks, is that in the near future, will marriage and divorce mean the same thing? Replies in the form of remedies will be much appreciated. Cheers!!

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    Apr 14 2012: My goodness. I am so glad that You posted this topic/question. I just got through a crapstorm with my wife, but I managed to keep control of the ship. Khushal I feel for you. I am someone that takes being married very seriously and I am willing to make and have made many sacrifices to make my partner as comfortable as they can be. On top of that, I've tried to do things to improve my self to be a better husband. It is difficult with everything being me me me. I am very much the opposite...everything is for my family. I think after weathering this storm my wife has more appreciation and respect for me. And I will continue to love her and be strong so that she knows that I'm the best person for her. We may not see eye to eye on many things, but she cant deny that she has someone that cares about her best interests and the interests of our family at heart. I think there need to be more mentors of married. That can give the advise and emotional support to those who need it. Many times husbands and wives feel alone in the world or like they are the only ones that are going through tough times with their partners but there are many who have stuck through everything to be a better partner. I hope to be one of those people as well. What I have noticed most about my mentor friends is that ...one of the partners must be willing to love without reason. Love no matter what the outcomes of life are. If you can do this, it will not guarantee the success of your marriage but it should increase the feelings of respect, loyalty and admiration of your spouse. I hope some, any, or even a small bit of what I write can help you.
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      Apr 14 2012: My friend......Marriage is like a double edged sword....its always complicated.....sometimes...the more u try to fix it....the more situation can worsen up...So my brotherly advice to u would be: " Never be complete, stop being perfect, lets evolve, let the chips fall where they may, we should stop worrying alot" My father always use 2 say......dont be sad if u failed in a task for which u worked day and night....but rather be happy...and accept it as ur fate......May God help u in this turbulent times ur passing through

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