TED Conversations

This conversation is closed.

Deception in Dating and Relationships

I deeply believe in truth! i like being honest and i like being honest to.
From my knowledge some people "play games" when they first dating with someone, games that play on our insecurities or of "child candy" where they wave something that you want (meeting them, being with them, sex?) and they dont give it to you... unless you do something, follow a path they want and so on.

Mostly my problem is with the games themselves, and maybe it because i am not good at them, but it seems that people enjoy them! It is said that it makes the relationship stronger in the later stage.... if you survive and can play the game.

After Marco's talk i see how people might enjoy things, and i wander if this same outlook is to be used when dating someone? meaning that such games can actualy be good and really make you enjoy them?

What do you think?

Share:

Showing single comment thread. View the full conversation.

  • thumb
    Apr 2 2012: I am extremely good at games. haha :) I don't play them because I don't believe in them. I don't like the seriousness and the meanness of most of these 'games.' They are literally trying to trick, not like a magic show where you suspend reality... just a person bending reality without your permission. These games are at your expense. Duping someone or being duped gives a very visceral sense of where the power lies. There is the principle of power and sexuality. It could explain a lot, but I don't know much about it to be honest.

    I do think there are other types of games. One person I dated would lie to me about unimportant things (tell me his birthday was one date, and later say it was another), and it literally was a game. He did not have anything to gain, and he liked when I figured him out, and I liked when he tricked me. I'm sure other people have similar games with different parameters that are not REALLY meant to be deceptive.

    Then again, some people like any and all games just for the challenge.

Showing single comment thread. View the full conversation.